Dredging up the Past
by The Confused One
Summary: Alex's past comes back to haunt everyone during a case. BA and MC.
1. Shocking Discovery

Dredging up the Past Chapter 1

By: The Confused One

Disclaimer: I don't own anything connected to CI. Please don't sue.

Rating: T, for now.

Warnings: None, for now.

Archive: Go for it. Just let me know where.

Reviews: Yes, please. Good, bad, or otherwise…please review. Thanks.

Author's notes: I couldn't help myself. I just had to start this fic. I promise I'll get Misconduct done in the next couple of days. Enjoy.

Alex Eames always hated morning crime scenes. Eight in the morning was too early to have to look at dead bodies. She sighed. She could already tell. It was going to be one of those cases. It was going to be a rough one. Walking away from the patrol officer, she walked up to her partner. As she watched him poke around the body, she explained, "The Chief of Detectives' niece. That should keep the pressure off. We have no witnesses, just the jogger who found her."

Bobby nodded, barely acknowledging what she said. He knew she knew he heard her. Pointing and poking around the body, he explained, "She was attacked from behind. He dragged her here and choked her with a rope of some kind." Addressing a CSU tech, he added, "We need a rape kit done and there is a semen stain there on her clothes." Finally looking at Alex, he finished, "She must have been coming home from a night at some clubs. The glitter…"

Alex smiled slightly. She understood where he was going, and she finished for him, "And the outfit."

Bobby met her eyes. He smiled slightly now too. He liked it when she did that. He explained, "We need to find out what club she was at."

Alex nodded. She agreed. She hated to be the one to say it, but she knew one of them had to, "I guess we need to ask the Chief how well he knew his niece."

Bobby nodded. Standing up, he began following Alex to the car. He wasn't looking forward to having to talk to their boss about a murder.

Getting into the car, Alex knew he was thinking again. She was just hoping he was thinking about the right things. She knew how much he hated the high pressure and high profile cases. They drained on him more than the usual fare. She warned, "He's going to be all over this case. You know that, right?"

Bobby almost smiled. He nodded and assured her, "Yeah. I know. I'm fine. We need to get this over with."

With that, Alex decided to let it go. She started the car and drove off. She'd just watch his mood and make sure he stayed OK. It wasn't like they hadn't been there before.

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Chief of Detectives Andrew Wheeler stood as Bobby and Alex entered. He greeted them, "Detectives. I appreciate Captain Deakins putting you two on this case. Though I'm not sure I'll be much help. God, I still don't understand what she was doing walking around the city at that hour."

Alex watched as Andy sat back down. She followed his lead and sat down in a chair too. She raised her eyebrows, knowing Bobby though was wondering the room looking at Andy's stuff. She knew he expected her to start, "We're sorry about Jenny. We met her at the picnic last year, and we liked her. We were wondering what you could tell us about her habits. Did she go out to clubs, a lot?"

Andrew sighed. He loved his niece, but there were things about her he didn't approve of. He tried to explain, "Jenny was always a bit of the wild child in the family. We weren't that close, but I do know that she went to a lot of different clubs."

Alex sighed. She had been hoping for more, but she wasn't about to give up, yet. She prodded a little further, "What about boyfriends? Was she seeing anybody? Have any trouble with any exs?

Andrew nodded. He quickly replied, "She just broke up with some kid a week or so ago. His name was Neil something. When you talk to Sherry, my sister, she can tell you his last name. She might even still have his address or phone number."

Alex nodded. Standing, she politely thanked him. She headed for the door, figuring Bobby was going to follow her out.

Bobby turned to face his superior officer. With a nod, he promised, "We're going to find the guy who did this. I promise you that."

Andrew nodded again. He gratefully replied, "Thank you."

Bobby finally asked, "Do you have a picture of her here? I mean, we could use a picture of her to show around."

Andrew nodded. Pulling out his wallet, he pulled out a picture. Handing it to Bobby, he offered, "It's not the best or very big but it should be alright."

Bobby nodded. Walking out, he replied, "Deakins will keep you in the loop."

Bobby quietly met Alex in the hall. She smiled at him. Sometimes she was still amazed at his ability to say just the right thing at the right time. Still, it had pretty much been a waste of time for them and Andrew. She sighed. They were getting nowhere fast and said so, "I hoping he'd be able to be of more help."

Bobby nodded. He understood her frustration. He was feeling it too. He reminded them both, "We should hit some of the clubs around where she was killed. Maybe one of the bouncers or bartenders will recognize her. I think she left with this guy."

Alex nodded. The sick feeling in her gut told her that he was right. She finally agreed, "Well, let's hope he's a regular and someone there knows his name then."

Bobby nodded. He had another hope though and voiced it, "It might be someone she knew too. It's possible she went with someone and things just got ugly when they left."

Alex didn't like any of it really. She hated these cases. They had a tendency to hit too close to home. Trying her best to be neutral, Alex got in the car and started the engine. She wasn't sure how long she could ignore the growing knot in her stomach that told her something was about to come crashing down on her, but she was determined to ignore it for as long as possible.

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Alex was starting to get tired. It was now four in the afternoon, and they were entering the third club. So far they had been striking out, but she was really trying to remain hopeful. Seeing the bartender, Alex approached the bar. She knew Bobby was following. Pulling out her badge, she, as always, started, "Hi. I'm Detective Eames, and this is Detective Goren. Did you work last night?"

The bartender nodded. He had never had cops show up before, and he was getting nervous. He replied, "Yes. I was here. Is something wrong?"

Bobby put his hand up. He assured him, "You're not in trouble. We need to know if you saw this woman last night."

The bartender studied the picture carefully. Looking up, he met Bobby's eyes. He answered quickly, "Yeah. She was here. She had this older guy all over her all night. She kept telling him to back off. She finally just left. I think he left shortly afterwards."

Alex nodded. She could tell he had relaxed some. She was relieved. Jumpy witnesses were pretty much always bad news. She quickly asked, "Did you get a good look at him?"

The bartender nodded quickly. He ventured forward, "Yeah. I got a good look at him. Has something happened?"

Bobby quickly answered, "She was murdered. We really need you to come with us and meet with the sketch artist, Mr.…"

The bartender quickly finished the sentence, "Donahue. Trevor Donahue. I. I guess I can come with you."

He came around the bar. The two detectives lead him out. Alex finally asked, "Did you happen to catch this guy's name?"

Trevor got into the car and sadly replied, "No. I didn't. I just know he was bugging her."

With a knowing glance between them, Bobby and Alex got into the car. There hopes had been momentarily dashed, but maybe the sketch would be able to get a name.

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A sick feeling ate at Alex as she stared at the sketch, again. She still felt she recognized who it was. Handing it to Bobby, she refused to believe it. It couldn't be the same person. She was relieved when her phone rang. She quickly answered, "Eames."

Bobby stared at the drawing, and listened to Alex as she spoke to someone on the phone. It sounded like something was going on. It might be the break they were looking for. It had been a week. Going through Jenny's apartment, talking to her friends and family, and interrogating Neil Warren had gotten them no where. All they had was the sketch.

Hanging up the phone, Alex met Bobby's questioning eyes. He never seemed to disappoint her. She quickly explained, "That was the lab. Apparently, our semen sample matches another in the system."

Bobby arched his eyebrows. Grabbing his notebook and jacket, he followed Alex to the elevators. He wanted to know who this second victim was.

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Walking into the lab, the lab tech explained, "The case it matches is an old rape case, 1984. It was before DNA testing was widely used. Someone had the forethought to preserve the evidence. The years we've spent updating the system like this might pay off for you guys on this case. Unfortunately, your perp isn't in the system. We were just able to link it to this one case. Good luck on finding your victim again."

Alex nodded slightly. Something inside her was desperate to find out who their victim was. She impatiently pushed, "Well, bring it up."

Bobby didn't like this. Something felt wrong. He knew as well as anyone that rapists don't usually let a good twenty-two years past between rapes. He suggested, "When we leave, expand your search to include the whole Country. He hasn't stopped at two."

Alex agreed. It didn't make sense. There had to be more cases.

With a nod, the tech, John, pulled up the match. He proudly announced, "You're looking for Alexandra McCall."

Bobby instantly looked at Alex, who gasped slightly. Her hand covered her mouth. Her face had drained of all color. He started to say her name, when she took off. Looking at John, Bobby explained, "We won't have to go far to find Alexandra McCall. She's Alexandra Eames now."

Leaving the shocked and confused John behind, Bobby went desperately searching for Alex.


	2. Heart to Heart

Dredging up the Past: Chapter 2

By: The Confused One

A/N: Thank you everyone who has read the first chapter. I hope this chapter doesn't disappoint.

He found her sitting against a wall in an empty room. He walked in hesitantly. This was new territory for them, and he wasn't sure how far she or he was comfortable with. He didn't want her to take off again. He didn't want to hurt her. Reaching her, he bent down to meet her eyes. He finally ventured, "Hi."

She wasn't surprised to see him. In truth, she was kind of glad he had. There was something about how he was looking at her, it reminded her of how he looked at suspects he wasn't sure of. She snorted and decided to not make him work for it. She met his eyes quickly and took a shaky breath. She explained, "I thought. I thought it was in the past. I thought was OK. I knew I recognized that sketch. I should have said something before. I guess I just didn't want to admit it to myself or you."

Bobby nodded. He understood. She had buried that particular part of her past, much like she had her past with her deceased husband. He didn't want to push her. He didn't want her to through any more pain than she'd already been through. He finally spoke, "It was like your sketch too? If you don't want to talk about it, I'd understand. We've never really talked about it before."

Alex looked away from him for a moment. She understood and greatly appreciated what he was trying to do, but she knew it was pointless. One of the worst moments of her life was about to become open and discussed. It didn't matter if she didn't talk about it now. He'd have to know eventually. It might be important to nailing down this guys MO. He was trying to save her the embarrassment and let her off the hook, but she knew she couldn't let him do it. Steadying herself, she stared at the door. She couldn't look at Bobby and do this. Taking a deep breath, she began, "I was eighteen and just started college. I was living in the dorms. It was my first real taste of freedom. It went to my head a little. I did stupid stuff. Stuff I knew better than to do and stuff I'm not proud of now. One of those things was going clubbing with friends, getting strange guys to buy me, underage, drinks. And sometimes, well, let them take me home. The night. I was getting back from those clubs. I left early, and I was very drunk. Just like with Jenny, he came up behind me… I remember thinking I recognized him. I had met him somewhere. I think he must have been at one of the clubs. Jenny… this whole case has been making me uneasy. I guess I know why now. I probably blew him off like Jenny did. I was too damn drunk to even know for sure. I've just, always assumed."

Bobby listened carefully. He finally looked away from her. He sighed and closed his eyes. Moving beside her, he leaned his head back against the wall. He tried to focus, but he couldn't get the image of Alex, his Alex, in that position. She was always so strong and confident. He tried to assure her, "You didn't do anything wrong. I think you're right about the clubs though. It's where he met Jenny. I'd be willing to bet it's where you met him. It's probably part of his pattern, and knowing you, it probably wasn't a gentle rebuff either, especially if you were drunk. He chose you because of it."

Alex stared straight ahead. She didn't even flinch or seem to acknowledge him or his words. She didn't dare look at him. She finally continued, "I know that. You're right. I didn't ask for it, but it happened. Being the daughter of a cop, I called 911. It turned into a real nightmare then. I was poked and prodded for hours. My Dad flipped. My brothers were on a mission to find this guy. I sometimes think my Dad and brothers would have killed him if they had caught him. My sister and mother on the other hand were treating me like breakable china. They almost coddled me to death. They tried to do everything for me. I have never felt so helpless in my entire life, not even when Josh died. I think once the two detectives who got my case heard the details the only reason they worked it was my Dad. They got nowhere, and I barely spoke to my Dad or brothers for months. I was too ashamed. I really. I felt dirty, and like it was my fault. I was supposed to be the tough as nails oldest child of Mary and John McCall. I was supposed to take care of myself. Not that you need to hear any of this part. You and your books. Everything I went through dealing probably has a name and you know it by heart."

Bobby shook his head. The last thing he wanted was for her to shut down on him. He tried to reassure her, "No books. No analyzing. I promise. I'm just listening. I want to be here for you. This isn't going to be easy. I'm not judging. You know I could never judge you. If you want to talk, talk. I want to listen."

Alex smiled a little. She finally found her courage and looked over at him. She sometimes appreciated him more than words could say. She admitted to him, "He stole my sense of security, my identity. He stole everything that made me, me. God, I was so angry about that. I wasn't going to live like that. I wasn't going to let him win. It's one of the reasons I'm here. I wanted to feel safe again and prove to myself I could take care of myself. I wanted to be me again, so I became a cop. So, I guess, ironically, we can both thank him for that. I love my job. I love being a cop. I love working with you. I couldn't imagine doing anything else now."

Bobby smiled slightly now too. At least she had a positive come out of the horrible situation. He promised, "As long as I can help it, I'm not going to let you regret that decision or the decision to withdraw your request for a new partner."

Alex smiled again and turned away from him. She sighed and knew someone had to say it. She added, "Deakins is going to flip."

Bobby nodded. Getting serious now too, he agreed, "Yeah. He's going to want to take us off the case. I'm not entirely sure he'd be wrong. I'm not sure I'll be able to keep from beating the crap out of this guy when we find him."

Alex flinched slightly and immediately found his eyes. She was worried and pleaded, "Don't. Don't say stuff like that, please. My Dad and brothers are bad enough. I don't need that from you."

Bobby closed his eyes. He could see the worry and almost panic in her eyes. She was terrified her family wasn't going to come after this guy, and she didn't want to have to worry about him too. He felt like an idiot. He should have known better than to say something like that. He rubbed his face with his hand and apologized, "I'm sorry Alex. I'm just saying. If I feel like this, I can only imagine how you're feeling, and maybe we should bring Logan and Barek into this. They just finished a case and have some time. It'll calm Deakins down too. Neither of us can be very objective right now. It might be for the best."

Alex resigned herself to the inevitable. She nodded and knew he had a point. This was going to, obviously, get very personal. She was reluctant though. She faced Bobby again and explained, "I'm not running from this Bobby. Bring them in if you think we need to, but you have to understand what I'm saying. He took away my sense of safety, my self-respect, and my confidence, just for starters, once already. I feel. I feel like walking away would be surrendering that to him again. I won't do that. He didn't crush me before, and he's not going to now. I won't let this guy beat me. I'm not that scared eighteen year old anymore."

Bobby nodded in understanding. Sometimes he was sure that she must be the strongest and most incredible person he had ever met. He was in awe of her a lot of times. He relented, "Alright. Promise me something though. If it gets too intense, if it's too much, you'll let me know. I don't want you to have to go through anymore than you have to."

Alex nodded. She smiled again. She appreciated it when he tried to protect her. It made her feel special. She agreed, "I promise. I'll let you know."

Bobby nodded. He rubbed the back of his neck. He knew she was going to hate this. He hated to bring it up, but he knew someone had to, "We're going to have to pull your file. The information could be important."

Alex slowly nodded. The sick feeling in her gut returned momentarily. They needed to pull her file. She swallowed and agreed, "Yeah. Maybe something in it will stand out for you."

Bobby grimaced. He stopped short of trying to tell her how much he didn't want to have to see that file. It wouldn't make any difference. He was going to have to see no matter if he wanted to or not. Instead, he stood and changed the subject, "We need to go talk to Deakins."

Alex nodded. She took his outstretched hand, and let him help her to her feet. They headed for the SUV. She finally asked, "Is that tech going to call if they find more."

Bobby nodded. He couldn't help himself though, and he replied, "I'm sorry Eames. There are more than the two of you. I'm sure of that."

Alex bristled slightly. She finally nodded and got into the drivers seat and wordlessly got into the car and started the engine. She mentally tried to prepare herself for what they were about to face.


	3. Telling People

Dredging up the Past: Chapter 3

By: The Confused One

A/N: I'm glad people seem to like this fic. This chapter brings Mike and Carolyn into the story. So, enjoy, and please, remember to review. Thanks.

Bobby and Alex sat at their desks. Alex desperately tried to concentrate on her paperwork. She tried to ignore what file Bobby was looking at. Every embarrassing detail of her rape was in that file. Trying to deal with her paperwork wasn't working, but she couldn't look at Bobby.

Finishing the file, Bobby closed his eyes and choked back the anger he felt for this rapist and murderer. Looking up at her, he could tell she was avoiding looking at him and not quite succeeding on working on her paperwork. He spoke quietly, "I'm sorry."

Alex finally met his eyes. She nodded. Trying to keep her focus on the case, "Did you find anything useful?"

Bobby nodded. He decided to follow her lead and focus on the case. He responded, "Just. I think you were first. There is clear escalation."

Alex snorted and leaned back. It wasn't the easiest thing to hear. She whispered, "Lucky me. I guess someone had to be first."

Bobby found her eyes again. He didn't like that statement at all. Worried, he replied, "If…"

Alex waved her hand dismissively, realizing how he was taking her statement. With a sigh, she assured him, "I'm fine."

He was watching her so intently, trying to make sure she was indeed fine, that he didn't even notice Deakins approach their desks till he cleared his throat. Looking up at the Captain, he greeted him, "Hi."

Deakins was surprised and worried. He could feel the tension. Something was wrong. He finally asked, "What's going on over here?"

Alex looked at Bobby. She could tell he was waiting for her. He was deferring to her wishes. She appreciated that. She nodded and looked at Deakins again. She wanted to get this over with, and she only wanted to do it once. She asked, "Can we grab Logan and Barek and take this into your office?"

Deakins nodded slowly. His stomach churned a little. If he hadn't known something was wrong before, he knew for sure something was wrong now. He could feel it. He agreed, "Alright." Looking at Mike and Carolyn, he asked, "Logan, Barek, my office please."

Exchanging looks, Mike and Carolyn knew something was going on too. They dutifully followed Deakins, Bobby, and Alex into the office.

Finding a place in a corner, Bobby held onto his notebook, that he had dutifully put Alex's file into. He had grabbed it, unwilling to let it sit out in the open at their desks. He found Alex's eyes, hoping to send her enough courage to get through this.

Alex gave him a small encouraging smile. She wanted him to know she was alright. She finally spoke, "No need to beat around the bush here. The semen from Jenny Nelson's skirt matched another, older case, my case. It wasn't solved, so we still don't have a name, but a pattern is emerging."

Deakins' face fell. He stomached dropped. This wasn't happening. When he had approved Alex's transfer he had read the file. He knew what she had been through. He never imagined it would ever come up, especially in a case. Suddenly Logan and Barek's presence made sense. Meeting Alex's eyes, he spoke first, "I'm sorry Alex. That's why they're here?"

This was the last thing Carolyn Barek had expected to hear. She could tell her partner was mercifully shocked. He had a tendency to sometimes say stupid stuff. She offered, "If there is anything we can do…"

Sensing Alex could use some help, Bobby took over, "We don't really want to walk away from this case, but for everyone's sake, we want them involved."

Barek nodded. She could tell Deakins didn't like this idea at all. She could tell that they had talked about this, and they did really want to stay involved and tow the line. She understood the line they really wanted Mike her and her to play. Looking over at Mike, she could tell he understood and agreed with her. So, she decided to help, "We're the perspective guys. We can do that."

Deakins sighed and nodded. He could tell he was outnumbered. Waving them off, he relented, "Alright. We'll do it like this, for now, but if this gets out of hand, I'll pull whoever I have to from this case. Understood?"

When the four nodded, he breathed easier. He just hoped things wouldn't get as bad as he feared they would get. He sent them out, saying, "Eames, go fill them in. Goren, I want to talk to you a second."

Alex nodded. She was beyond relieved. She had really been afraid Deakins was going to force her off the case. Standing, she thanked him, "Thank you. I really am OK Captain."

Bobby met her eyes, and gave her a smile to tell her everything was fine. He watched her follow Logan and Barek out of the room. Turning his attention to Deakins, he assured him, "She really is OK. She's dealing with it."

Deakins nodded. He appreciated how Bobby was able to answer the question without having to ask. Not to mention, he was protective of his detectives. So hearing that she was really OK was something was glad to hear. He pointed towards the door, and explained, "We catch this guy, I don't want her to have to be anywhere near him."

Bobby nodded and agreed. He didn't like the idea of Alex having to deal with this guy either. He promised, "I'm not planning on having her anywhere near him. I'm not going to let anything happen to her, trust me."

Deakins nodded. He decided to let it go. They were on the same page, "Go join the others."

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Alex took a deep breath and announced, "Well, that about covers it."

Carolyn nodded and studied Alex for a moment. Letting her worry get the best of her, she asked, "Are you really OK?"

Alex smiled. She appreciated the concern, but she got tired of the same question all the time. She assured them both, "I'm fine. I promise. I just want to finally catch this psycho."

Walking up behind her, he heard the last part. She was already getting tired of people asking if she was OK. He could hear it in her voice. He steered the conversation back to the case, "Deakins wants to be kept in the loop."

Alex nodded. She appreciated the save, but she wasn't going to let him not tell her what went on with Deakins. She added, "Of course. He also want to ask how I was?"

Bobby didn't like the edge in her voice at all. He had been hoping she'd let it go and not ask about what went on in there. With a sigh, he replied, "He just wanted to make sure everything was fine. It was nothing."

Alex looked him over, not believing a word of it. She decided to let it go for now though. Bobby's desk phone ringing broke the silence.

Bobby sighed and picked up his phone, "Goren."

He closed his eyes and sat down. With a sigh, he announced, "We'll be right there. Thanks."

Alex met his eyes, as he hung up the phone. She offered, "They found more?"

Bobby leaned back in his seat and nodded. He hated this. He quietly answered out loud, "Yeah."

Mike shook his head. He was angry. Someone had hurt someone he knew and cared about. They got away with it, and they've hurt more people. Grabbing his stuff, he replied, "Let's go then."


	4. Painful Revelation

Dredging up the Past: Chapter 4

By: The Confused One

A/N: I hope people are enjoying this fic. I'm trying to keep it interesting. Enjoy this new chapter, and please remember to review.

Bobby led the way into the lab. Seeing the tech, he didn't hold back but just asked, "How many?"

The tech sighed, knowing they weren't going to like this. He pulled out a file and replied, "So far, one thousand and seven, and we're still getting more. So far, he's killed every one of them but two."

Alex closed her eyes. She resisted the urge to hurl. Taking the file, she flipped through it. She couldn't believe it. They were from all over the country. She looked up at the tech and asked, "Nobody realized they had a serial on their hands?"

The tech shrugged. He hesitated momentarily, before explaining, "This is the first time he's hit the same county twice. Detective, I want to say, I'm sorry…"

Shooting a look at Bobby, she realized he knew. Swallowing her anger, she interrupted the tech, "Its fine."

Bobby felt guilty now. He had to get her out of there. He herded them out, as fast as possible, "If you get more, let us know."

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Sending Mike and Carolyn to set up in the interview room, Bobby focused on Alex. He sensed she was upset, and he tried to apologize, "I'm sorry. It was when he pulled up your file. I just… I'm sorry. I didn't know what to say."

Alex met his eyes. She knew she wasn't really mad at him, but she didn't really want to talk about it. Shrugging it off, she pointed to the room Mike and Carolyn were in and replied, "We need to get in there."

Bobby sighed and watched her get up, and he followed her into the room.

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Mike closed another file. He was getting tired and angrier by the minute. There were so many brutalized, raped, and murdered women. It sent his head swimming. Looking at Bobby, he reported, "Anne Garrison. She's our other survivor. Two months after Eames, in Boston."

Carolyn absently closed her file too. She reported too, "April Snyder, first one with a rope, in Philadelphia. She was three months after Anne Garrison."

Writing on the board, Bobby stopped. A sick feeling was creeping over him. Studying it, he traced the guy's path. He muttered, "Buffalo." Louder, he asked, "Jessica Henderson from Buffalo was next. It wasn't Anne Garrison. It wouldn't make sense for him to basically double back."

Carolyn pulled out Jessica's file. She was utterly confused. She pointed out, "But they found her after Anne Garrison, and he killed Jessica."

Bobby stopped. He watched Carolyn put the file back down. He closed his eyes. The sick feeling in his gut was only getting worse. Turning to Alex, who was reading a file, he called her name. Getting her attention, he hesitated, "You. You didn't have a scarf, belt, or anything like that with you, did you?"

Alex blinked. She was hoping this wasn't going where she was afraid it was going. She leaned back in the chair and answered, "No."

Bobby slowly nodded and closed his eyes. This was bad. He didn't want to say it out loud. He turned back to the board, to keep anyone from seeing his face. He finally asked, "Jessica, how was she killed?"

Mike was most definitely not following Bobby's logic. Taking the file from the pile, he answered, "She was strangled with her belt."

Carolyn eyes widened now. She got what Bobby was getting at. Grabbing Anne's file, she answered the question Bobby didn't have to ask, "No scarf, no belt, nothing. The next one was strangled with a rope."

Alex felt like throwing up now. She knew. She was alive because of a fluke decision in how she dressed. She nearly whimpered. Desperately trying to keep it together, she focused on the file she had in her hand. She wouldn't let it get to her. She would be strong, and she wouldn't worry over what could have been. Keeping her voice calm, she called out, "I have a Jessica Daniels, from Kansas. She was killed in January of nineteen-eighty-eight."

Bobby finally turned to face her, worried. It was like the news hadn't even registered. Meeting her eyes, he could see the panic and pain. Suddenly, she stood and bolted from the room. He instinctively took off after her.

Finding her in an empty interrogation room, she was in a ball on the floor sobbing, almost hyperventilating. Getting down on his hands and knees he held her. He whispered, over and over, "It's OK. You're OK."

As she calmed, Alex let herself enjoy his hands rubbing up and down her back and stroking her hair. She finally whispered, "I'm sorry. I was OK till I saw your eyes. He was going to kill me. I wasn't prepared for that."

He still held her, almost afraid to let go. He closed his eyes and whispered, "Don't be sorry. You did nothing wrong. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry it happened and you have to go through this."

Allowing herself another minute, she pulled away from him and pulled herself together. Remembering earlier, she assured him, "We're OK by the way. I was just mostly trying to deal with the news of how many there were, and I was surprised that he knew. A part of me feels responsible. What if. What if I set him off? What if he was fine till I turned him down?"

Bobby shook his head. He wouldn't let her think like that, and he knew it wasn't true. He insisted, "It wasn't you. A rebuff didn't twist him like this. Someone out there hurt him, and they hurt him bad, but it wasn't you. You are not responsible for these other women. You were just a kid. And I am sorry I told him. I didn't think. I was just worried about you, and I had to get out of that room and find you."

Alex nodded. Meeting his eyes, she steeled herself again. Standing, she suggested, "I'm fine now. Thank you. We should get back."

Bobby shook his head no. He was still worried about her. She was pushing too hard and trying to process too much about something that was very personal. Standing, he replied, "We're going to go eat first. I think we could both use a break. No arguing."

Alex nodded. She allowed him to lead her back upstairs.

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Seeing Alex and then Bobby take off down the hallway, Deakins got worried. He knew something was wrong. Entering the room, he eyed the quiet and worried Mike and Carolyn. He asked, "What happened?"

Mike took a deep breath. He looked at Carolyn and then Deakins. He had to keep from punching a hole in the wall. He finally answered, "We think, now, he meant to kill all of his victims. After two didn't have anything handy to kill them with, Alex and an Anne Garrison from Boston, he started carrying the rope."

Deakins closed his eyes. This was bad. This was very bad. He wanted this guy caught, and he wanted it done yesterday. He was about to say something, when Carolyn's phone rang. She quickly answered it, "Barek. Yes. Really? Alright, keep him there." Hanging up, she explained, "A bartender just spotted the guy from the sketch."

Mike jumped up from his seat, chomping at the bits to do something. He excitedly followed Carolyn out of the room, saying, "Sending that sketch to all the bars just paid off."

Deakins was worried about all of his detectives. He called after them, "Be careful. I'll tell Goren and Eames."

Deakins sat down to wait. He didn't have to wait too long. Bobby and Alex, confused, slowly walked into the room. Deakins asked, "Logan and Barek told me. Are you OK?"

Alex nodded. She tried to give him a reassuring smile. She hadn't realized how much this was going to take out of her till now. She tried to reassure him, "I'm alright now. Where did Logan and Barek go?"

Deakins sighed and admitted, "They had a call come in. The sketch paid off."

Bobby nodded. Looking at Alex, he knew. She wanted to see this through. He asked though, daring to hope, "You want to wait for them?"

Alex nodded. She sat down and met Bobby's eyes. She knew she didn't have to explain why. She appreciated that. She simply replied, "Thanks."

Bobby sat down beside her silently. He was going to wait this out with her. He was going to keep her in one piece. She had done just that so many times over the years for him. He would do the same for her now. The three sat silently waiting for news.


	5. Alex's Pain

Dredging up the Past: Chapter 5

By: The Confused One

A/N: Well, this chapter took a little over five hours to type up. LOL This was mostly due to interruptions to what I thought would be a nice quiet evening. Anyway, what I'm saying is please enjoy and review. Thanks.

Alex sat, relieved and nervous both. The man they believed to be her rapist all those years ago had finally been arrested, but he was in a cell just in the next room. She stared at the door. She was also angry. Bobby was refusing to let her see him. She wanted to face him. She wanted that satisfaction and closure. It irritated her that he was trying to deny her that.

Putting a fresh cup of coffee in front of her, he worried. She was mad at him. He could tell. She wanted to see him, that he knew and understood, but he worried that seeing the man that was still John Doe to them would be very bad for her. It was clear to him, from the last few hours that she wasn't as past what happened as she would like to believe. She had forced herself to bury it, to avoid it. He was afraid her feelings were going to become too much for her soon. He feared she'd have a melt down if she talked to the guy. Sitting down, he took a sip of his coffee. She was staring at her coffee cup. He finally spoke, "I don't want you hurt."

Alex finally met his eyes. She was angry, and she wasn't sure why she was letting him keep her away, but she was. She knew that if she really wanted to see him, she just had to walk into the next room. He was right there. With a sigh, she knew she couldn't stay mad at him. She decided to be difficult anyway, "I'm not a fragile piece of glass or something Goren. I'm really fine. I just. I never got this when it happened. I never got to confront this guy. I want to do that."

Bobby wasn't about to argue. It would just antagonize her, and she'd probably go see the guy just to spite him. Right now he had her calm and cooperating. He wanted to keep it that way. He knew he couldn't keep her away if she was determined to see him. He tried to make her understand, "I'm worried about you doing that right now."

With that, Alex made up her mind. She was not weak. Hoping to distract him, she asked, "Can you get me some skittles? I'm suddenly in the mood."

Bobby looked her over suspiciously for a moment. Even though Carolyn and Mike were Deakins office, Bobby nodded his agreement. Getting up, he headed for the break room.

Seeing him disappear, Alex jumped up and made a beeline for the holding cells. She almost crept into the room. She stared at him for a long moment. This was the man who had hurt her so much?

His name was Aiden, but he wouldn't tell them that. Meeting the eyes of the pretty Detective who walked into the room, he was fascinated. Something about her was familiar. He knew her somehow. He could tell she knew him too. Suddenly, it hit him like a ton of bricks. He smiled and then laughed. It had to be her. How was that for a small world? To be sure, he called to her, "Alex?"

A shutter involuntarily went through Alex's body. She hadn't expected him to recognize her. She was beginning to feel nauseous. She knew in that instant that coming to see him had been a mistake. Trying to keep herself together, she replied, "It's Detective Eames."

Aiden nodded. Realizing her name was different, he asked, "You got married? That's nice. Does he know what you were like before? You and your slut friends? Does he know how I owned you? I could have done anything I wanted."

Alex looked away. She bitterly yelled, "You don't own me. You never did. No one owns me."

Aiden laughed, again. He continued taunting her, "It would have been so easy to just slip my hands around your neck. I could do it now, if I wanted."

Stepping back, Alex kept her distance. She wouldn't put herself in that position. She was practically shaking now. The rational part of her brain knew he couldn't hurt her, not now, but she was terrified. Yet, she couldn't leave. Meeting his eyes again, she made her stand, "I'm not afraid of you. I don't cower in fear worrying that you're out there. You have no power over me. You have no control over me."

Aiden continued looking her over. He was getting angry. She still had no manners. She still needed to be broken. She was standing in front of him and facing him. It infuriated him, but he kept him cool. Showing his rage was the last thing he wanted to do. It would give away his plan. He wouldn't be able to find her. He wouldn't be able to personally break her, and he was determined to. Alex Eames would cower in fear of him, if it was the last thing he did.

Freaked out, Bobby almost ran into the room. He had come out with the skittles and realized she wasn't at her desk. Making sure she wasn't in Deakins' office, he had taken off for the only other place he knew to look. He stopped. She was shaking, but she was standing her ground. He knew she would. She always would. Fear never stopped Alexandra Eames. Even he knew that. It didn't mean facing this one was good for her yet though. Finding his voice, he called her name, "Alex."

She slowly turned to face Bobby. She was beyond happy to see him. He'd get her out of there. She couldn't take much more. She calmly replied, "Hi."

Bobby was beginning to panic. She was about as white as a ghost. She was shaking and terror was written in every part of her face and body. She was tenser than he had ever seen her. He calmly and quietly replied, "We should go."

Aiden wasn't about to let them leave that quickly. Watching them, he was too intrigued. He wondered if this was the husband. There was definitely something there. Maybe it would be useful to him. He spoke quickly, stopping them both in their tracks, "Is this your husband Alex?"

Alex refused to turn around and face him again. She didn't even really want to answer him, but she did anyway, "No. He's my partner."

Aiden was even more intrigued. She had feelings for her partner? Her partner had feelings for her? This was too good for him to pass up. He tried to goad them, "And what about your husband? Is there a reason you don't have a ring?"

Alex turned to him in a fury. Her heart was racing and she felt like she was only getting sicker. She yelled, "Don't say another word about Josh."

Aiden smiled again. He had gotten her attention. He ventured further, "Did you get killed? Is that it Alex? Is that why you've allowed yourself fall for your partner there?"

Seeing that things were clearly getting out of hand, Bobby stepped in. True or not, he wasn't going to let this guy play Alex. He told Alex, "Let's go."

Alex gladly did as she was told. A conversation about how she felt about Bobby was the last thing she wanted to have with that man. Making it to the interview room, she collapsed in a chair and desperately tried to catch her breath. The last of her resolve finally gave out and she dissolved into fresh tears. She felt him hold her again. She realized he was on his hands and knees as she finally began to calm. She finally whispered, "I'm so sorry Bobby. You were right."

He rocked her back and forth gently. He tried to make it better, "Shhh. It's alright. You're OK. You're going to be fine."

Pulling away finally, Alex was embarrassed. That was twice in one day. She silently cursed herself. This was becoming a habit and a new record for her. She was Alex Eames. She was stronger than this. She had been dealt with this. It just made her angry again. Meeting Bobby's eyes, she apologized, "I'm sorry Bobby. I'm OK now. I'm beginning to feel quite ridiculous."

Shaking his head, he touched her cheek. He hated seeing her like this, and knew the prying eyes of their colleagues didn't need to see this either. He wanted to get her out of there. Finding her eyes, he replied and took charge, "Don't apologize. It's OK. You're allowed to be emotional. Let me take you home."

Alex nodded, and she stood up as he did. She numbly followed him out to the bullpen. She ignored all the stares. She watched Bobby talk to Mike and Carolyn for a moment. He then returned with both of their stuff and ushered her out of the building.

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Leading her inside, he put their stuff down in an empty chair. Watching her sit down, he suggested, "I'm going to make some coffee."

Alex absently nodded. She still couldn't believe what was happening. She couldn't believe what she had done. Her father would be so embarrassed. Alex Eames had cried. God, she was tired. She was so tired. She was so lost in thought, that she didn't even realize the coffee was ready till he put a cup in front of her. Startled, she looked up and met his eyes. She leaned back into the soft cushions and absently wished Bobby would hold her again and make it all go away. She finally settled for, "Thank you, for earlier. I don't want… I can handle this. I really am OK. You don't have to say here."

Leaving was the last thing Bobby Goren was going to do. Alex needed him. Ignoring Aiden's words, Bobby insisted, "I don't mind staying. I don't want you to try to deal with this alone."

Alex shook her head. She wanted him to go. She wanted to be alone with her feelings. She didn't want to cry in front of him anymore. She couldn't be vulnerable in front of anyone anymore that day. She practically pleaded, "Please Bobby. Please go. I just. I want to be alone."

Bobby understood because he understood her, but he wasn't about to leave, yet. He tried to reassure her, "You don't have anything to prove to me. You don't have to hide from me. You know that right?"

Alex nodded slowly. She did know that. She trusted that. She could let herself go in front of him. She appreciated that, but she found it so hard to show emotions sometimes. She grew up in a household of mostly brothers and cop for a father. She spent more times playing football growing up than braiding hair. She admitted, "It's not easy for me. I'm not a sensitive emotional person. In my family, emotions and tears were a sign of weakness. And a McCall is not weak."

He moved beside her. Trying not to come across like an all knowing psychiatrist, he encouraged her, "I know, but sometimes it's too big to keep inside. You've never really gotten past this Alex. I can see it every time I even look at you. It's going to eat you up until you deal with it. You have emotions and feelings Alex. You're allowed to express them."

Alex closed her eyes, letting the words sink in a little. Turning a little, she met his eyes. She knew he was right. She had held so much in for so long. That's what scared her. If she really let the flood gates open, could she close them? Could she trust him to help her? She knew the answer to that question. She finally admitted, "I am tired. I'm tired of being OK, even when I'm not."

Bobby understood. It was the same for him most of his life. Most of his pain, he had let out with Alex. Now she was going to let hers out with him. It was almost cathartic to him. It felt right. She leaned over on his shoulder and just began rambling. Bobby listened intently. He would remember it all, and he would never question her feelings, emotions, or worries. They were valid in her mind. He would though, later, make sure to disprove any of her incorrect fears. Maybe she wouldn't even notice it. And maybe she'd let herself cry the real cry she needed.


	6. Pizza and a Deli

Dredging up the Past: Chapter 6

By: The Confused One

A/N: Well, I figured we could use a lighter B/A scene by now. I'm throwing in some Logan/Barek stuff too. Enjoy. Please read and review. Thanks.

It had taken awhile, but Bobby had let Alex ramble about everything and anything. He had even thrown in his two cents when she had asked. When she had started to feel a little better, he called and ordered pizza from her favorite place with her favorite toppings.

Now, Bobby on the couch with her and laughed. She had been telling him about the time her youngest brother broke his arm playing in the yard, after he had been told to stay inside. She was leaned up against his arm, with her legs tucked under her. He felt he could listen to her for forever. He decided this had been exactly what they had both needed. Using the arm she was against to hold his paper plate, he used the other hand to eat his pizza. He replied, "I'm sure your father was happy."

Alex smiled. It occurred to her that she was probably more comfortable and content in this moment than she had been in years. She always liked the effect Bobby had on her and the effect she had on him. They put each other at ease. It proved useful to her in the past, and now, it had proven useful for him. She continued her story, "He was livid, mostly because he had waited two days before even saying anything. I can just imagine the pain Jake was in. He was so afraid of getting into trouble that he was trying to suffer through it. They had a horrible time setting it at the hospital because he waited so long."

Bobby smiled again. He could just imagine. The humor outweighed his ability to empathize with her brother this time. He replied, "I bet. I don't guess he climbed that tree again."

Alex laughed. Sitting up, she shook her head. She revealed, "He broke into pieces in a couple of places. He had to wear that cast for like six months, but as soon as he got it off, he was back in that tree." Standing, she asked, "Do you want another coke?"

Bobby smiled at the story. Her family was definitely made of stern stuff. Not that he had doubted it before. Swallowing the last of his slice of pizza, Bobby put his plate back on the table. Answering her question, he replied, "No thanks."

Alex walked to the kitchen and grabbed another can of coke. She smiled to herself, knowing he was watching her. She knew he did it sometimes, and she never minded much. She found it comforting sometimes, but she never took it to mean more than his protectiveness. She didn't dare. Sitting back down, she turned to face him. Getting serious again, she changed subjects, "Thank you. I don't know what I'd do without you."

Bobby met her eyes. Of everyone he had ever met, she was the hardest for him to understand. Sometimes he was sure he knew how she'd react to anything, and other times she could surprise him without trying. This was one of those times. He finally tried to brush it off, "You'd be OK without me. You can get through anything."

Alex shook her head. Sometimes he really drove her crazy. This was one of those times. She insisted, "Maybe I would get through it, but I can smile right now because of you. This wasn't going to be a good night for me."

Bobby nodded. Accepting her words, he remembered something, "Oh. I forgot to give you something."

Alex was confused. Watching him dig into his coat pocket, she smiled when he pulled out the bag of skittles. Taking them from him, she replied, "Thank you. I'm sorry about that. I thought I could handle it."

Bobby smiled and watched her open the bag and eat one. With a sigh, he got serious, again and tested the water, "We'll see how the evidence stacks up, but…"

Alex met his eyes. Closing her eyes, she interrupted, knowing what he was about to say, "even though the statute of limitations has run out on my case, because he didn't kill me, me and my case might still be dragged into the trial."

Rubbing her cheek, he tried to reassure her, "I'm sorry. I'm just trying to prepare you for what might happen."

Shaking her head, she laughed. She tried to assure him, "I've waited twenty-two years to see him go to jail. Whatever it takes to do that is fine by me."

Bobby nodded. He hoped she was being honest with him. He watched her eat another skittle. Pointing to the bag, he changed the subject, "I've never understood how you can eat that stuff."

Alex smiled. With a shrug, she replied, "And I don't understand what you like about trail mix, but everyone has their thing. For me, it's… comfort food."

Bobby nodded. He could understand that. He relented, "That I can understand."

Alex laughed. She teased, "Good. Cause I really don't want to have to explain comfort food to a genius."

Bobby smiled. He assured her, "I know what comfort food is." Looking at the wall, he noticed the clock and the time. Surprised, he commented, "It's already ten. I guess. I should go."

Alex stood up with him. A part of her desperately wanted him to stay. She wanted to be near him. She wanted to be with him. She didn't dare ask though. Instead, she started to let him go, "Alright. I guess. I guess I'll see you tomorrow."

Bobby nodded. Heading for the door, he asked, "I'll take a cab home, and you can swing by and pick me up in the morning?"

Alex nodded and tried to smile. She agreed, "Yeah. I'll see you then."

Alex watched at her door as he caught his cab. Closing it, she closed her eyes and headed for her room. Changing and washing her face, she crawled into bed. She just hoped it wouldn't be a long night.

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Sitting in the interview room, Carolyn sighed. The women were starting to meld together. She massaged her temples. Looking across the table, she noticed Logan's hand was clinched in a fist. His knuckles were white. She sighed, again. Reaching across the table, she touched his hand. Having his eyes meet hers, Carolyn suggested, "It's been a long and exhausting day. We should go."

Mike nodded. Leaning back, he tried to let the tension and anger go. He replied, "You hungry?"

Closing her files, Carolyn answered, "Yeah. I'm starved. You want to go grab something?"

Mike nodded, again. He offered, "Sure. I mean, I don't know how good my company is going to be, but I'll pay."

Carolyn smiled. Picking up her stack of files, she teasingly agreed, "Well, if you're paying, we're going somewhere nice."

Mike wagged his finger and picked up his files and retorted, "I don't think so."

Carolyn laughed now. Grabbing her things, she suggested, "The deli down the street is fine."

Mike nodded his agreement. Grabbing his things, he followed her out of the building. He enjoyed spending time with Carolyn. She had a way of calming him down, and he liked that. He needed someone who could keep him in check. After all, he had a famous temper, and he had found that she could keep him in check. He followed her down the street in pleasant companionable silence.


	7. Getting Through the Night

Dredging up the Past: Chapter 7

By: The Confused One

A/N: I was going to add Mike and Carolyn at the diner, but then I decided it would be too redundant. Everything they were going to talk about is going to come up later. So, forgive me for that. I plan to write a lot more M/C in the next chapter.

Waking up in cold sweats, Alex curled up in a ball. She couldn't shake the images of the past. They wouldn't let her sleep. Debating with herself, she finally picked up the phone and dialed a number she knew by heart, the only person she felt she could.

Waking up, Bobby reached for the phone. He sleepily answered, "Hello?"

Alex closed her eyes. Her hands shook. She almost hung up.

Looking at the caller ID, Bobby realized it was her. He was getting worried. He called out to her, "Eames? Alex?"

Alex knew she had to say something now. He knew who it was. Finding her voice, she replied, "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have called."

Sitting up, he tried to assure, "No. It's fine. What's wrong?"

Leaning her head back against the headboard of her bed, she swallowed and finally admitted, "I. I can't sleep."

Bobby closed his eyes. He knew. Silently cursing himself for leaving her, he replied, "I'll be right there."

Alex sat up again. The last thing she had expected was for him to come back. She was about to protest when she heard the click of him hanging up. Hanging up her own phone, she leaned back against the headboard again. She felt guilty now. She hadn't meant to drag him back out from his apartment.

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Bobby had thrown his shoes on and jumped into the car he own but rarely drove. Alex usually just picked him up for work and dropped him back off. He sped all the way to her apartment, regretting leaving her alone more with each passing minute it took him to get there. Unlocking her door with his spare key to her place, he called out, "Alex?"

Alex got up and met him in the hallway to her room. She almost smiled, realizing he hadn't even changed clothes. She didn't get to see Bobby Goren in his pajamas. It was appealing. She tried to reassure him, "I'm really OK. I. I didn't mean to drag you over here again. I just wanted to talk. I. I can't get it out of my head. I close my eyes and he's on top of me again."

Bobby took in a ragged breath. He should have known she'd have nightmares after confronting the guy. He finally walked over to her and hugged her. She tensed up at his touch. He was about to let her go when she eased some. He closed his eyes and pulled away anyway. Finding her eyes, he replied, "I'm sorry."

Alex was near tears again. Angry, she lamented, "I don't know what's wrong with me."

Moving her hair out of her face, he guaranteed her, "Nothing is wrong with you. You're finally dealing with something you; you didn't completely deal with when it happened. And you just faced him again today. It's. It's only natural that these things would resurface."

Alex snorted. Stepping back from him, she leaned against the wall. Avoiding looking at him again, she spoke softly, "I'm sorry…"

Tired of her apologizing for things that weren't her fault, Bobby interrupted, "Stop apologizing please. You don't have anything to apologize for. I. I'm going to stay, in case… I'll be on the couch."

Alex finally turned to face him again. She eyed him a long moment. She finally asked, "Could you… could you stay with me?"

Bobby stopped. Every bone in his body told him it was a bad idea for both of them. Emotions, good and bad, might get all mixed together and cause problems. Meeting her eyes, he tried to decline gracefully, "I'm not sure that's a good idea."

Alex closed her eyes. She was getting desperate. The need she had to be near him so she could get through the rest of the night was one of the few things she was sure of at the moment. Her voice was barely above a whisper and she almost pleaded, "Please. Just, beside me. It's not as bad when I'm with you."

Bobby swallowed. Trying to ignore his brain that was going into overdrive and sounding alarm bells, he found he couldn't deny her. He finally agreed, "OK. I. I just don't want to hurt you. You tensed up when I hugged you before."

Alex took his hand. She assured him, "I'm OK. I just, need to be near you."

Bobby nodded and let her lead him into her bedroom, fully aware how much torture this was going to be for him. He'd do it anyway. He'd do anything for her. He followed her onto the bed. Lying down, he let her curl up next to him. She clung to him like a giant teddy bear. He just wished he could make it all go away for her. She sighed as he stroked her hair, and after a minute, she was asleep. Taking a deep breath, Bobby tried to sleep too.


	8. A Plea?

Dredging up the Past: Chapter 8

By: The Confused One

A/N: Here is where the scene for Logan/Barek would have been redundant. A lot of this I would have done in that other chapter. I hope this chapter doesn't disappoint. Read, enjoy, and review. Thanks.

Carolyn walked into the interview room Mike, Bobby, Alex, and she had basically taken over. She noted Alex was absently sitting at her desk alone. Walking in, she handed Mike his coffee, and greeted Bobby, "Morning. Is she OK?"

Bobby sat down and sighed. He hated talking about it. He didn't want to break Alex's trust again, but he knew they needed some information about what had happened. He explained, "Uh. Yeah. She'll be OK. She just needs a minute. She had a rough night."

Sitting down, Carolyn was concerned. She prodded further, "Nightmares?"

Bobby nodded. With another sigh, he elaborated again, "She shouldn't have talked to him. It brought some stuff back. I'm worried about the evidence and her possibly having to testify."

Mike nodded. He was glad he and Carolyn had gone to dinner together. They had talked about this very thing. He assured Bobby, "We talked about that. Hopefully the DNA evidence and the fingerprint evidence and all of the files will be enough. Her file will be included. She shouldn't have to say a word."

Bobby closed his eyes and spat, "But nothing beats live testimony. She knows that. She'll insist on testifying, no matter what it does to her. Not that any of it will do a damn thing to get justice for what he did to her. Statute of limitations ensures he can taunt her with what he did as long and as much as he wants. He can't be prosecuted for it, and he knows it."

Carolyn nodded. She knew he was right, but she refused to believe there was nothing they could do. She suggested, "What if he takes a plea?"

Bobby met her eyes. The idea intrigued him, on some level. It would protect Alex. He asked, "What do you have in mind?"

Carolyn, with a little more hope, described her plan, "If he takes life with no parole, Alex doesn't have to say a word. I'm sure Carver can get Branch to agree to it."

Mike hated the idea, for more than one reason. He pointed out, "We're talking the Chief of D's niece. He's not going to want Branch taking pleas on this case, especially when the evidence is so good. It's going to be nearly an impossible sell."

Carolyn, irritated, insisted, "Well we have to try something. Do you want her to have to see that psychopath again?"

Mike shrugged. He commented, "We're talking about Eames here. She's strong. This guy deserves a needle in the arm. If anyone ever deserved the death penalty it's this guy. It's not just about Eames. We have over one-thousand women he's brutally raped and killed. They don't deserve justice?"

Carolyn raised her voice. This was getting irritated, "They will get justice! We're going to at least talk to Carver. That's that Mike. Look at her out there. Can you really subject her to more of this?"

Bobby had stopped paying attention. He was staring at Alex. She was staring at her desk. Closing his eyes, he got up and left the room, ignoring the continuing fight.

Mike sighed. He knew when he was beat. He relented, "Fine. We'll talk to Carver. God, she was fine yesterday."

Carolyn glared at him and grabbed a new file. She replied, "She talked to him yesterday. Did you not hear a word Bobby said?"

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Pulling his chair around to her side of the desk, Bobby spoke softly to her, "Where are you right now?"

Alex blinked and finally met his eyes. Shaking her head, she took a deep breath before replying, "Uh. Sorry. I guess I zoned out."

Bobby smiled slightly. With a nod, he asked again, "Where to?"

Alex snorted. Taking a deep breath, she replied, "The day after. Don't worry about it. What's going on in there?"

Bobby debated whether or not to tell her. Deciding she was going to find out soon or later and would be royally pissed if he didn't tell her now, he admitted, "They're talking about the merits of talking to Carver about trying to get him to offer a plea."

Alex looked totally confused. She asked, "Why? We have rock solid evidence and lots of it."

Bobby didn't want to say it. He finally replied, "You'll have to ask them. Maybe it's for the best if he does take a plea."

Suddenly realizing what was going on, Alex snapped at him, "He's not getting a plea because everyone is worried about me. I won't do that." Standing up, she marched into the interview room and yelled at Mike and Carolyn, "I don't need everyone trying to protect me! I'm perfectly capable of testifying without falling apart."

Carolyn tried to calm her down, "I believe that. We all know that. It would just be easier on you, for everyone if you didn't have to."

Bobby was standing behind her, in the doorway. Stepping in further, he closed the door. The rest of the squad didn't need to hear this. He backed Carolyn up, "She has a point Alex. You want to have to get up in court and go through every gruesome detail?"

Alex was furious now. She continued to yell, "Yes! If it puts him in prison for the rest of his miserable life or gets him the death penalty, yes I do!"

Mike tried to back her up, "Told you she'd feel this way."

Carolyn glared at Mike and tried to talk to Alex some more, "That's what we want too. We just want Carver to offer to take the death penalty off the table if he confesses. He'd be getting life without parole. No one wants less, and the Chief of Ds is going to have a say in this. No one wants him to ever walk out of a jail cell. All of this is mute anyway, till we talk to Carver. We won't know if this is even a remote possibility till we talk to him."

Calming down, Alex closed her eyes and sat down. She felt Bobby sit down beside her. Embarrassed about her outburst, she relented, "Fine. If that's what everyone wants to do. Talk to Carver."

Bobby sighed. He was beginning to feel a little defeated. He confided, "From what I saw yesterday, he probably won't take the deal anyway. He seems obsessed with Eames."

Carolyn sighed. She was hoping Bobby was wrong. She simply replied, "Well, we can try."

A hesitant and soft knock on the door got everyone's attention. Mike waved the guy in. He explained, "I have some rush prints on a John Doe."

Mike sighed and took the prints from the kid, who promptly took off. Opening the package, he smiled. He announced, "Well. What do you know? He has a name now, Aiden Carmine."

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Aiden sat alone in the interrogation room. He was anticipating what was to come. He was about to have a little fun. He watched Mike and Carolyn walk in. He smiled at the two detectives and greeted them, "Ah. Yes, Detectives Logan and Barek. How are you both?"

Mike, disgusted, stood beside Carolyn and got down to business, "We're here because the DA has a deal for you. If you're smart, you'll take it. See, he doesn't want this to turn into some three-ring circus. Personally, I'd like to see you fry, but then, I don't always get what I want. The DNA evidence will be back soon. It's going to seal our case for us. This is your chance to save your miserable life. The DA is willing to take the death penalty off the table if you confess."

Carolyn, sitting, opened a file and kept her head buried in it as she picked up where Mike left off, "Your prints were rushed Mr. Carmine. We just got them back a little while ago. I guess it doesn't pay to get caught committing petty theft at thirteen, if you're going to spend over twenty years roaming the country raping and murdering. We already pulled your file. We'd be glad to get your lawyer up here if you want to think about this. You don't have to give us an answer now."

Aiden was furious. They had found out too much already. He shouted at the detectives, "No! I don't need a lawyer to know I don't want to take your stupid deal. I know you're just trying to protect one of your own, but you can't protect Alex from me. I will own her."

Carolyn finally looked up at him. She informed him, "You don't really know her at all, do you?"

Aiden looked from Carolyn to Mike. He could tell he was getting to Mike. He decided to push and see how far Mike would let him take it, "Ah, but I did. In those bushes, I owned her. She fought and begged the whole time. I had to hit her several times before she'd finally shut up. She doesn't listen. She's real dense. You should have seen how short that skirt was. It made it so easy."

With that, Mike had had it. Leaning forward, Mike lowered his voice, "You son of a bitch!"

Watching Mike, Carolyn kept her cool. She got his attention, "Logan."

Mike stopped. Furious, he stormed out of the room. He hated Aiden Carmine.

Aiden leaned forward a little and spoke softly to Carolyn, "It kills you, doesn't it? You can't touch me for it. Statute of limitations is a real bitch, isn't it?"

Getting up, Carolyn warned, "Murder doesn't have a statute of limitations. You won't take the deal? They're going to stick a needle in your arm, and no one is going to shed a tear."

Getting up now too, Aiden threatened, "You're going to regret that."

Ignoring him, Carolyn walked out and into the viewing room. Disgusted and with a sigh, Carolyn talked to Deakins, "It's not just Eames. He's obsessed, pathologically with controlling all women. Women have to be submissive with him. We should figure out what triggered this. It might be the only way to break him."

Deakins sighed. Shaking his head, he replied, "Well, no wonder he's obsessed with Eames. She's anything but submissive."

Carolyn smiled. She took a deep breath and replied, "Goren was right. Seeing her yesterday, he's focused on her. He's realized he left her alive and not broken her. She's strong, independent, and not afraid. He feels like he has to break her."

Mike was furious still. Furious, he seethed, "Bastard."

Carver shook his head. He commented, "Well, we tried. He's determined to get the death penalty he deserves. I'm still not sure Branch would go through this anyway."

Carolyn sighed and tried again, "I'm telling you, something set him off. If we can find that, we can get a confession."

Deakins knew what she was saying, and he was more than willing to give them some latitude, "Start digging."


	9. A Visit From the Chief of Detectives

Dredging up the Past: Chapter 9

By: The Confused One

A/N: Hopefully this chapter will tie up some things and move things forward. Please enjoy and review. Thanks.

Alex looked up from the file she was reading when Mike and Carolyn walked into the interview room. Alex found she was feeling a lot better than she had earlier, and she was beyond glad for that. She watched them sit down defeated. With a sigh, she broke the silence, "I'm assuming from the looks on your faces he didn't take the deal."

Carolyn sighed too. She had really hoped to save Alex the heartache. She admitted, "Bobby, you were right. He's obsessed with Alex, and no, he won't take the deal."

Alex closed the file. She closed her eyes and berated herself for having had any sort of hope at all. She knew better. She suggested, "It's for the best. Carver didn't really even get permission to make that deal. Not to mention it's not really much leverage. He knows he's going to have to face the same charges in hundreds of courtrooms around the country. One of them is bound to put him on death row."

Bobby sighed now too. A part of him expected them come back empty handed, but a part of him had hoped they'd get somewhere with him. A part of him was disappointed too. Looking out the window, he noticed Chief of Detectives Andrew Wheeler walk through the bullpen and to Deakins office. He gave the others a heads up, "Chief is here."

Carolyn groaned as she watched him walk into Deakins office. With a sigh, she replied, "He's probably upset about the almost plea."

Irritated, Mike groaned, "Just what we need."

Preferring to focus on the task at hand, Bobby continued to compare the list he had in his hand to the list on the board. After a moment, he addressed the others, "All of his business trips coincide with every case." Seeing the looks of confusion, he explained, "Well, I mean, I was trying to understand how he was supporting his cross country trips. His base is here in New York. He's a salesman, of sorts."

Curious, Alex jumped in, "Alright. I'll bite. Sells, what?"

Bobby smiled at her. Putting the file down, he explained, "He's a pharmaceutical salesman. He travels the country talking to doctors about the new drugs coming out. That's why most of the cases our up here in the northeast. That's his territory."

Unimpressed, Alex sarcastically replied, "So why didn't he just drug…" Realizing what she was saying, she closed her eyes and finished, "everyone."

Bobby met her eyes, making sure she was OK. He finally replied, "He doesn't actually have access to the drugs, just the information about them."

Before anything else could be said, a knock on the door got everyone's attention. Bobby motioned Deakins and the Andrew inside. Bobby thought Andrew looked very unhappy.

Walking in, Andy stared at the stacks of files. He finally asked, "All of these?"

Mike nodded. He explained, "Every single one." Pointing to a small pile, he continued, "And those just came in today. I think we're up to around one thousand and twenty five by now."

Totally crazed by the amount of files, Andy demanded, "And you four want to plead him out?"

Knowing the plea had mostly been her idea, Carolyn jumped in, "That was my idea. We have over one thousand counties who are going to want to file against this guy. Someone is going to give him the death penalty. Maybe it doesn't have to be us."

Alex closed her eyes. She couldn't let Carolyn fall on the sword. They all knew that wasn't the reason Carolyn had pushed to cut Aiden a deal. Sifting through some files, Alex began speaking, "That's not her real motive for pushing this." Finding her file, she handed it to Andrew and explained, "That's one is me. She thinks she's protecting me by keeping me from having to testify."

Andrew looked up from the file in shock. Any trace of anger was immediately gone. Meeting Alex's eyes, he lowered his voice considerably, "I'm sorry."

Alex looked back at Carolyn and tried to brush her reveal aside, "I'm a big girl Carolyn. I appreciate the effort, but I promise I don't really need protecting."

Handing the file back to Alex, Andrew tried to change gears a little, "Well, did you get anything from him?"

Mike shrugged and replied, "Nothing of any value. He only copped to Eames. He acts like he's getting out."

Carolyn arched her eyebrows. Finally getting what Alex was saying, she responded, "Well, he's not, ever."

Alex was more intrigued by the other thing Mike had said. She asked, "What did he say about me?"

Mike closed his eyes. He promised her, "You don't want to hear it. Don't worry about it. None of it matters."

Andrew was confused though. He pushed, "Why would he admit to anything?"

Alex sighed and reminded him, "Statute of limitations. He's trying to play games with us."

Andrew didn't like this at all. He finally asked, "And where are you going with this now?"

Carolyn assured him, "Carver is preparing for his arraignment as we speak."

Andrew thanked the four and headed for the door. With a sigh, Deakins eyed his detectives carefully. He finally replied, "I'm sorry about that. The four of you look hell though, and you've done what you can today. All of you go home and get some rest and time away from this."

The four nodded in grateful agreement and watched him walk away. Alex leaned back in her chair and turned her attention to Bobby. Taking a deep breath, she almost pleaded, "Get me drunk, please."

Bobby smiled. With a nod, he agreed, "Gladly."

Looking at Carolyn and Mike, Alex asked, "You two want to join us?"

Mike and Carolyn both agreed. Grabbing their things, the four left the building in search of a good bar.


	10. The Bar

Dredging up the Past: Chapter 10

By: The Confused One

A/N: Well, I wanted them to have a little fun. Sorry, apparently I can't stay with the fluff for a full chapter with this fic. LOL Enjoy and please review. Thanks.

Laughing, Alex sipped her beer. She was relaxed, something she hadn't felt much of for days. She quipped to Mike, "You're lucky she didn't throw that beer in your face."

Mike smiled sheepishly. In that moment he had no doubt that Alex would have. He tried to defend himself, "Hey. I was just trying to get her number. I can't help it if I wasn't very smooth when I was young."

Carolyn laughed. She teased him a little more, "I certainly hope you've improved since then."

Bobby even laughed a little when Mike looked at him like he was trying to get some support. Bobby shook his head and replied, "I know better than to argue with the two of them."

Mike even laughed now. Looking over at Bobby again, he suggested, "You want to shoot some pool?"

Bobby shrugged and nodded. He agreed, "Sure, if you're willing to risk it."

Alex smiled from her seat. She warned Mike, "Be careful Mike. He's very good."

Mike nodded and replied, "Ah. I can handle it, and I'll keep it in mind."

Carolyn laughed as the two guys walked away. Looking back over at Alex, Carolyn commented, "Bobby is going to cream him, isn't he?"

Alex laughed now too. She nodded and agreed, "Probably. Bobby is pretty much the best pool player I've played against, even better than all of my brothers."

Carolyn smiled and nodded. She could see that. With a sigh, Carolyn asked, "Another beer?"

Alex shook her head no. She replied, "No. Four is definitely more than enough." Alex then watched as Carolyn walked over to the bar. Turning her attention to Bobby and Mike, she smiled as Bobby sunk a couple of balls at once. She watched him miss the next one.

Sitting back down, Carolyn watched with Alex for a moment. Carolyn finally looked at Alex and asked, "You seemed a little suffocated most of the day. How are you doing, really?"

Alex sighed and leaned back in her chair. Looking at Carolyn, she admitted, "Mostly, I'm OK. Bobby's been great. He's been there when I needed him, very supportive."

Carolyn nodded. She looked at the guys again. Bobby sank another couple of balls. She added, "I saw that. It's good. I'm glad you have him."

Alex nodded. She watched Mike playfully move Bobby's cue, trying to throw him off. She agreed, "Yeah. Honestly, he's gotten me through this."

Carolyn looked over at Alex and smiled. She watched Mike take a shot and sink a ball. She assured Alex, "He cares about you a lot. He'd do anything for you."

Watching Bobby sink the eight ball, she nodded and added, "Well, Mike would do anything for you too. We have two good guys. We're lucky."

Carolyn nodded. She smiled as the guys returned to the table and agreed, "Yeah. We are."

Bobby smiled as he sat down and asked, "What are you guys talking about?"

Alex smiled and agreed, "You two."

Mike laughed and questioned, "What did we do?"

Carolyn laughed and assured him, "Nothing. We were actually saying good things about you both."

Alex sighed. Getting up, she announced, "Well, I'm getting a cab and going home."

Bobby grabbed her arm. As she turned to face him, he suggested, "I've only had one. I'm good. Let me take you home."

Alex didn't have to ask where the extra chivalry came from. She knew why he wanted to take her home. She understood why he wanted to make sure she got home safe. Turning to face him, she was about to turn him down, but she saw the look in his eye. She nodded slowly and agreed, "Sure. Thanks."

They both ignored the looks on Mike and Carolyn's faces as they left. Carolyn smiled and commented, "They're going through a lot, both of them."

Mike nodded. Taking a sip of his beer, he agreed, "Yeah." Changing the subject, he asked, "Where do you want to start tomorrow?"

Carolyn shrugged. She suggested, "I guess we start with Aiden Carmine's parents and from there."

Mike nodded absently and finished his beer. He still hated the idea of letting the guy take a plea, but he'd go along with it, as long as it was what everyone else wanted. He finally asked, "When are we going to tell them what you're planning?"

Carolyn took a deep breath. She suggested, "Once we're done?"

Mike shook his head. He wasn't comfortable with that, and he voiced his concerns, "She's going to have a fit when she finds out, especially if we do this behind her back."

Carolyn nodded. She finished her second beer and allowed, "Yeah, but she'll get over it, and I want to help."

Mike shrugged. He pointed out, "I think this helped more than the disastrous try at a plea."

Carolyn sighed. Leaning back in her chair, she argued, "What do you want from me Mike? It didn't work out, but I don't want to give up. We can save her the trouble."

Mike insisted, again, "She doesn't want to be saved from this. If she did, then I'd be more behind it. You know I'm in Barek, but don't think this argument is over or that I'm really completely behind this."

Carolyn sighed. Exasperated, she stood and replied, "I think I'm going to head out too. I'll see you tomorrow morning."

Mike sighed. Feeling guilty, he called out to her, "Barek, Carolyn, he's scum that deservers to die."

Carolyn nodded. Closing her eyes, she agreed, "Maybe, but that result worth Eames?"

Mike sighed. With a nod, he asked, "What is it you and Goren are seeing that I'm not?"

Carolyn shrugged. She admitted, "It's her eyes Mike. She's not dealing well. She's barely holding on, thanks to Goren."

Mike nodded. He accepted her words and let it go, "Night Carolyn."


	11. Therapy?

Dredging up the Past: Chapter 11

By: The Confused One

A/N: Well, I think we all knew the admissions below were inevitable. LOL I mean we all know I can't write a CI fic hardly anymore without adding some ship. So enjoy, and please remember to review.

Alex staggered slightly into her apartment. She flipped her shoes off and turned to face Bobby. She smiled and spoke, "Thanks for the ride."

Bobby smiled. He was fast realizing that somewhere between the bar and her apartment the drinks had really hit her. She was drunk. He stood against the wall and watched her with amusement. He hadn't ever really seen her like this. He pointed out, "I think your drunk now."

Alex laughed and agreed, "Probably."

Bobby nodded. He pointed to the couch, "Go ahead and go to bed. I can stay here."

Getting serious, she walked closer to him. Alex asked, "You think I'll have more nightmares?"

Bobby swallowed hard. There was no easy answer. He delicately explained, "I wanted to stay, in case. In case you did."

Alex nodded slowly. She felt pathetic, and she hated the idea of feeling so weak, but she refused to go through another night like the night before. She wanted to stop the nightmares before they even started, and she wanted him. She wasn't sure if it was the alcohol that made her brave enough or desperation for his comfort, but she kissed him.

Stepping back, he bumped into the wall. He was overwhelmed. It took ever ounce of his willpower to try to cool things down, "Alex, this is a bad idea. You're not…"

Alex closed her eyes. She interrupted him, "Right. I'll be in my room."

Bobby managed to touch her hand, and she stopped. He spoke to her, "This isn't about how I feel about you."

Alex's heart skipped a beat. She dared to hope and tried again, "I don't need protection from anything Bobby. I need you."

He was relieved when she finally turned to face him again.He met her eyes and promised, "You do have me. God, help me. I love you."

Alex took a ragged breath. She admitted, "He was right about something Bobby. I love you too."

Bobby nodded. He watched her for a moment and agreed, "I know. That's why. That's why I can say it."

Alex closed her eyes. She finally asked, "Then why…"

Bobby leaned his head back against the wall. He tried to explain without hurting her, "You're not up for that right now. I know it."

Alex stared at him for a moment, trying to make sure she understood. She refused to get anymore signals crossed. She insisted, "I am."

Bobby finally reached the end of his rope. He had never let go of her hand. With one swift movement, he had her turned around him and pinned against the wall. Kissing her deeply, she groaned. It was when he moved to her neck that she tensed like he knew she would. He let go of her. Stepping back, he could see the pain in her eyes. She was shaking slightly. He closed his eyes and hated himself for doing it, but he knew he had to show her. He had to make her see how much dredging up what happened had messed with her head. He softly apologized, "It's OK now. I'm sorry."

He watched as she took off past him into her room and slammed the door. He banged his head against the wall once. He cursed himself for hurting her. He should have found another way. Knowing he had to make sure she was OK, he walked up to her door. Knocking softly, he called to her, "Alex?"

When she didn't answer, he took a deep breath and opened the door. He was a little relieved to see her just sitting on her bed, facing the wall. She didn't move besides the movement of her chest. He tried to reach her again, "Alex."

She finally met his eyes. She was angry. She was angry at Aiden for hurting her, twice now, but mostly, she was angry at herself for letting it still haunt her. She asked, "What is wrong with me?"

Bobby sat down beside her. He promised her, "Nothing is wrong with you. I told you. You're finally dealing with this. It was a major trauma in your life Alex, and it's been reopened."

She looked away. She couldn't look at him. She tried to assure him, "It wasn't you. I'm not afraid of you."

Bobby nodded. He promised her, "I know. I shouldn't have done it. I'm sorry I hurt you. I was trying to prove my point."

Alex was relieved that he seemed to understand. She hadn't wanted to hurt him either. With a sigh, she asked, "Why can't I just listen to you?"

Bobby watched her for a moment. He knew she wouldn't like it, but he wasn't going to lie to her. He smiled softly and surmised, "Because you're stubborn. That and you want to pretend like none of this could possibly faze you even a little. You want it to be like when it was buried. Which is something you can do again, if you really want, or you can fight and actually deal with it this time."

Wiping the one tear she had allowed to escape, Alex reminded him, "I told you, I'm tired of hiding and pretending. I'm trying."

Bobby smiled. He rubbed her cheek and promised her, "It's all up to you. I won't push you to do anything. But I think. I think you should see someone, Alex. If you want to deal with this, you need a professional."

Alex shook her head no. She confessed, "No. The idea makes me feel, broken. I have nothing against psychiatry, but it's not for me. I could never feel comfortable trying to confess my deepest and darkest feelings to some stranger."

Bobby sighed. He tried to explain, "You're not broken. You know it won't be like this forever. Just. Think about it."

Alex finally met his eyes again. She explained, "Bobby, I just need you. Every time I feel like I'm falling apart, you're right there, and I'm OK. You're getting me through this."

Bobby tried to redirect her, "I'm no substitute for a real therapist."

Alex sighed. She stood up and began going through drawers for pajamas. She replied, "I don't want to fight about this."

Bobby nodded in understanding. He stood and headed for the door, he offered, "I'll. I'll be out there."

Alex rolled her eyes. She smiled slightly. They had been moments from having sex, but he, always the gentleman, was still going to go to the other room. Changing, she opened her door, and watched him sitting on her couch. She leaned against her door frame. Finishing her moment of watching him, she called his name. When he turned to look at her, she offered, "Don't sleep on the couch. Please."

Bobby watched her for a moment, trying to decide what he should do. He was still nervous about being in the same bed with her. He hesitantly spoke, "You're. You're, sure?"

Alex nodded. She replied, "I need to be near you. It helps."

Bobby nodded. He followed her into her room. Removing his belt and shoes, he climbed in. Alex settled in against him. Her breathing eased after a moment, and they laid, in perfect harmony before sleep overtook them both.


	12. The Papers

Dredging up the Past: Chapter 12

By: The Confused One

A/N: I'm very sorry that this chapter took so long. For some reason, I just couldn't get into the place to write this chapter. Please enjoy and remember to review. Thanks.

Bobby's cell phone woke him up. Grabbing it off the table, he answered, "Goren."

Alex lazily woke up at his movements. She was relieved. She hadn't had one nightmare. Sitting up to give him room, she watched him answer the phone.

Sitting at her desk, Carolyn stared at the newspaper. She felt the bile rising up inside her again. Focusing, she spoke to Bobby, "Bobby, where are you right now?"

Confused, Bobby glanced at Alex and answered, "At Eames'. What's wrong?"

Carolyn sighed with some relief and didn't ask the obvious questions, for now. Instead she warned him, "The story is all over the papers. Someone leaked, and they have Alex's story. It's the lead in the post."

Getting out of the bed, Bobby angrily demanded, "What?"

Carolyn closed her eyes and laid the paper down on her desk. She explained further, "They crucified her, Bobby. It's a one sided tale of a stupid teen bar hopping. Idiots even tried to question her ability to do her job."

Bobby went pale. This was the last thing he wanted Alex to have to deal with. It meant, no matter what, she was going to have to face reporters, testify, and be at the center of the storm. Murmuring he expressed his displeasure, "Damn it!" Glancing at Alex's surprised and increasingly worried face, Bobby calmed down. "Thanks for the heads up. We'll meet you all at the arraignment."

He closed his phone and met Alex's worried eyes. He could see the questions there. He refused to show anymore anger though. It was the last thing either of them needed. At the moment, they just needed to get through it, and he knew he wasn't going to be able to hide it from her, so he tried to break the news gently. "That was…Carolyn. The, uh, papers have information on the case."

Alex's face went pale too. She knew what he was saying. She immediately took off for the front door. Grabbing the paper just outside it, she closed it again. Sliding down the door, she stared at her picture and the front page headline: 'Lead Cop is one of the Victims'.

Bobby immediately crouched down to the floor with her. He grabbed the paper to get her attention. Meeting her eyes, he practically begged, "Don't read it. Don't put yourself through it. It's crap, Eames. You hear me?"

Alex let a couple of tears fall and nodded her head slightly. She watched him put the paper down beside him, and she whispered, "Yeah, but what about my family? What about my parents? What about my brothers and sister? What about Daniel? They have to read this, Bobby. They have to see this. I didn't tell them it was coming either. It's going to kill my dad."

Taking a deep breath, he wiped away the tears from her face. He suggested, "The phone is right here. Call them. Talk to them. It's all going to be alright. You're going to get through this."

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Carolyn hung up the phone and took a deep breath. Looking over at Mike, she assured him, "Bobby will take care of it."

Walking over to her desk, Mike angrily grabbed the paper from her desk and put it in the trash. He bitterly replied, "Lying bastards."

Carolyn sighed and agreed, "Yeah."

Throwing the file he had carried over onto Carolyn's desk, he continued to vent, "Who writes that kind of crap?"

Overhearing on his way over to Carolyn's desk, Deakins answered, "All of them. Now she's going to be in the center of this."

Mike angrily, spat, "If I find out who called them…"

Carolyn sighed and countered, "It won't change anything now."

Mike insisted, "It would make me feel better."

Deakins promised, "I yelled bloody murder. I don't like this either. Believe me, it's being looked into. You mentioned something about finding out more about Carmine?"

Carolyn nodded. Refocusing on the case, she pulled the file and explained, "The rest of the files just came in. He spent his childhood in and out of the foster care system. His father took off when he was an infant, never to be seen or heard from again, and his mother was an abusive heroin addict and alcoholic who, from the notes made by the social worker, seemed to be quite overbearing. She died of an overdose in November of 1983. It seems to have triggered his rage. All of his suppressed hatred and anger towards his mother…he takes it out on these other women, who he imagines are so dismissive they must be the same way."

Mike sighed in disgust. He commented, "Bastard. Just great. Maybe we can ask him about all of this when we get back from the arraignment. I don't imagine he's going anywhere."

Carolyn looked at Deakins again and replied, "He's right. We have to get going. Goren and Eames are going to meet us there."

Deakins nodded and replied, "Alright. I want to the four of you to check in when you get back."

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Hanging up the phone, Alex took a deep breath. She met Bobby's eyes and whispered, "They're going to be coming by tonight. Thank you. You need to go home and get ready. We have to be at the arraignment."

Bobby nodded. Getting up, he stopped and looked down at her. He finally asked, "You're sure you want to go?"

Alex nodded. She insisted, "I'm not hiding from him. I'll be fine."

With a sigh, Bobby asked, "And you don't want me to wait for you?"

Alex sighed. She shook her head and assured him, "I'm fine. I promise. I'll meet you at the courthouse. Go get ready."

Alex watched him finally nod again, grab his things, and wordlessly head out the door. Getting up, she picked up the paper again and found herself curling back up on the couch and staring at it willing the words to make sense. She couldn't help herself. She wanted to know how bad it was.


	13. Arraignment

Dredging up the Past: Ch. 13

By: The Confused One

A/N: Yes, I know. Finally, here is the next chapter. I really am trying to get back on track with my writing. Some things have changed for me, and it's left me with a little extra time on my hands. So, hopefully, I'm going to start writing more again. As a side note, I just realized I gave the Chief of Detectives the same name as Mike's new partner. LOL Please enjoy the chapter, and remember to review. Thanks.

Throwing the newspaper onto the coffee table, Alex allowed a single tear to escape down her cheek. She wiped it away angrily. She would not let them get to her. The article was like a biography of her life that focused on every mistake she had ever made and every sin she had ever committed. The section on the letter and her partnership with Bobby made her stomach churn. She had to remind herself that they knew nothing about her, Bobby, or their relationship, and she couldn't bear to read it again.

Disgusted, Alex grabbed the phone and willed her hands to stop shaking. Bobby's words from that morning and the night before echoed in her head, and she knew she had to do this. After making a couple of calls, Alex got up to get ready.

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She was taking one last look in the mirror when someone knocked at her door. Not expecting anyone, Alex checked the peephole. Smiling, a little, she opened it and teased, "I am capable of making it to the courthouse alone, Bobby."

Bobby nodded and tried to explain, "I know. I just…wanted to go with you."

Alex nodded. She reached for her purse and assured him, "You have perfect timing. I was getting ready to leave."

As Alex closed the door, Bobby noticed the moved newspaper. He watched her carefully as they waited for the elevator. As the door opened, he stated, "You read it."

Alex noted that it was more of a statement than a question. With a sigh, she stepped into the elevator and admitted, "I had to, but it's vile. They wrote about every horrible thing I've ever done. They wrote about the letter. Didn't you read it at home?"

Bobby shook his head. She was near tears again. He hated seeing her in so much pain. Slipping his hand into hers, he squeezed gently and remarked quietly, "No. I didn't read it. Why should I? They're ignorant. They know nothing about you. I know all I need to know because I know you. I know how you think and what you've been through. I've seen the best and worst of you. I _know_ who you are, and I love every part of you. That's all I need. They can write what they want, say what they want. No one who cares about you, especially me, is going to pay attention to them. I wish you wouldn't either."

Alex closed her eyes. Sometimes she really wondered how she got so lucky. Squeezing his hand in return, she whispered, "Thank you."

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Arriving at the courthouse, Alex took a deep breath and flippantly asked, "I wonder who he got to represent him."

Bobby shrugged and replied, "I really don't care, as long as he doesn't make bail."

Getting out, Alex saw Mike and Carolyn approach them. She spoke first, "Hi."

Mike bitterly complained, "Vulture. Damn vultures, all of them."

Joining the four, Bobby asked, "What?"

With a sigh, Carolyn explained, "The media. I've never seen so many cameras."

Mike quickly added, "And I just talked to Deakins, the heat is being turned up. This is getting huge, and the feds are chomping at the bit to really take this over. Wheeler is still holding them off a bit longer."

Closing her eyes, Alex replied, "Good, because I don't want to give this up."

Mike assured her, "Neither do we." With a small smile, he continued, "He had some good news though. Apparently Wyeth, the pharmaceutical company Carmine worked for, is severing all ties, like he never worked there."

Bobby almost smiled and replied, "Doesn't surprise me."

With a nod, Mike spoke up, "Or me."

After a moment, Carolyn explained, "We thought we'd wait for you two, keep some of the press from her."

Alex sighed and nodded slowly. "Thank you."

With a nod, Mike offered, "Let's go."

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Walking up the stairs, the press swarmed the four of them. Overwhelmed, Alex staggered up the stairs as Mike, Carolyn, and Bobby flanked her to keep her shielded. She was trying to ignore the questions, till she heard one of the reporters ask, "Detective Goren, how is your relationship with Detective Eames since you found out about the letter? Did you know about it before she read it in court last year?"

Annoyed, Bobby growled, "No comment." He refused to drag the letter back up.

Stiffening, Alex saw red. She was furious. She started to turn around to yell at the reporter when she felt Bobby's hand on her arm. He whispered, "Don't. It'll just make it worse."

With a nod, she took a deep breath. She stewed all the way into the courtroom. Watching Mike and Carolyn walk up to Carver, she unclenched her jaw and vented to Bobby. "They're making Anne Garrison and me the story."

Watching her sit down, Bobby nodded and tried to assure her, "I know. It'll pass."

Alex closed her eyes and sighed. Looking at him, she quietly replied, "I'm sorry, Bobby. They've…dragged it out again." She just wanted to reach out and touch his cheek. She wanted to make sure he was OK. She found herself, once again, wishing she could take the letter back. The level of hatred she still had for that letter scared even her sometimes.

Bobby looked over at her and insisted, "This is not your fault. None of this is your fault. The letter is over and done with, Alex. Let it go."

Taking a deep breath, Alex nodded. She continued to avoid looking over at Aiden, who was sitting and staring at her quite obviously. Watching Mike and Carolyn talk to Carver, she added, "It just pisses me off, Bobby. They're dragging you into this. You don't deserve this, and you didn't do anything."

With a sigh, Bobby continued watching her, "You're the one they're… God, you don't deserve this either. You didn't do anything wrong, and don't worry about me. You know…I don't care what people say. I stopped listening years ago. You know that. Don't let them get to you." He'd honestly rather take as much heat upon himself as he could, just to keep it from hurting her.

Alex actually smiled. Sometimes his compassion, ability to understand, and ability to forgive amazed her. It certainly had during the Garrett case, when she had needed it the most and felt she deserved it the least. She was about to speak when Mike, Carolyn, and Carver made their way back over to them. She greeted them weakly, "Hi."

With a nod, Carver spoke specifically to Alex. "I'm sorry about the article Detective. It was out of line and uncalled for."

With a nod, Alex quietly replied, "Thank you." Finally glancing over at Aiden, she met his eyes, smiled, and asked, "He almost up?"

Carver assured her, "Yeah. Things are moving swiftly today. There are only two ahead of him, and I can pretty much guarantee that he's not going to make bail."

Sitting down next to Carolyn, Mike replied, "Good."

Alex could feel Aiden watching her now. Refusing to rise to the bait, Alex focused on Carver. She hadn't missed Aiden's lawyer and found herself hoping she was wrong. She asked, "His lawyer is Joe Mondale?"

With a sigh, Carver replied, "Yes, unfortunately. Why he took the case is beyond me. He can't possibly hope to get Carmine acquitted."

Mike snorted and commented, "You'd be surprised what people will do for enough money."

With a nod, Carver agreed, "Yeah." As the judge called the courtroom back to order, Carver sighed. "Excuse me."

Watching him walk back to his seat, Alex tried to prepare herself for what was to come. As the first guy was called up, Alex looked at Bobby, who was watching her again. She insisted, "Bobby, I'm fine. Don't worry so much, and please, at least for the moment, stop watching me. I've got enough people gawking."

Bobby glimpsed over her shoulder. Seeing Aiden's eyes were borrowing into Alex, he glared. Meeting Alex's eyes, he whispered, "I'm sorry."

Alex shook her head and blew it off. "It's fine." It was then that Aiden's name was called. She snapped her attention immediately back up front. She then finally looked back over Aiden to watch him stand. She smiled at him, knowing it would piss him off. She would show no fear to that man. Her anger at the reporters had refueled all of her resolve. She was brought out of her thoughts by the look of rage on Aiden's face.

Resisting the pull on his arm of his lawyer, Aiden met her eyes and sneered, "The papers are all over you."

Keeping her cool, Alex glared. People around the room began murmuring. Before the judge could call the room to order, Alex shot back, "Don't worry. You'll be the cover story as soon as you get convicted and the death penalty."

Furious, Aiden nearly lunged at Alex. Mike and Bobby were instantly at their feet and bailiffs were holding him back.

Alex smiled in satisfaction at the idea of having pissed Aiden off that much. The sadistic side of Alex enjoyed having the judge order him out of the courtroom for the rest of the proceedings.

Sitting down, Bobby looked at her with concern. He asked, "Are you OK?"

Alex nodded. Watching Mike sit down, she took a deep breath and realized she felt better than she had in days. She knew she probably should have kept her mouth shut, but she wasn't sorry. Turning to face him, she smiled and guaranteed him, "Yeah. I'm fine. It actually felt good."

Bobby gave her a ghost of a smile. That was his Alex peeking through. He had never been so happy to see her. He quietly replied, "Good."

Before another word could be spoken, gunshots rang out from the hallway. With the courtroom suddenly abuzz with commotion again, the four detectives jumped up and made their way out to the hallway. Hearing the disturbance down the hall, they quickly followed the noise. Reaching the scene, they saw two dead and bloody bailiffs. Wide-eyed, Alex recognized them as the two bailiffs who took Aiden out of the room. Horrified, she realized that she didn't see Aiden. Looking at the closest officer, she demanded, "What the hell happened? Where's Carmine?"

The officer shrugged and insisted, "We don't know exactly. It looks like Carmine got one of their guns, shot them both, and escaped. The building is being locked down, and an APB is being issued just in case."


	14. Fruitless Pursuit

Dredging up the past Ch. 14

By: The Confused One

A/N: And here, finally, is the next chapter of this story. LOL Things are just going to continue to get worse after this, too. I am not done with them, not by a long shot. This is one of the few stories that I have mapped out in my head right now.

Feeling like she couldn't breathe, Alex turned around and walked away. She had to get away. She couldn't stop the slight shake that had started in her hand, and she wasn't going to let anyone see it.

Angry and worried, Bobby watched Alex walk away. Turning to the officers, he gruffly ordered, "Find him!" Turning to Mike and Carolyn, he commanded, "Stay here. Deal with this."

With a nod, Carolyn assured him, "We have it covered. Deal with her."

Bobby simply nodded. Grateful that they were there, he caught up to Alex. "Eames." She didn't respond. Grabbing her shoulder, he insisted, "Alex, stop!"

Stopping, Alex rounded on him and pushed him off of her. In a low growl, she warned, "Don't! Don't touch me."

Wide-eyed, Bobby put his hands up in surrender. Taking a step back, he quietly assured her, "I'm sorry."

Taking a shaky breath, she closed her eyes. Relaxing some, she softened her voice. "No, I'm sorry. It's not…you. He killed two more people, and he's in this building somewhere…" She swallowed hard and quietly added, "I wasn't prepared for how that's making me feel."

With a nod, Bobby understood. Trying to keep her calm, he spoke soothingly and quietly. "I know. I know it's not easy, but it's going to be alright. You spent twenty-two years not knowing where he was. He's in the building. He'll be found."

Shaking her head, Alex snorted. Meeting his eyes, she vowed, "I'm telling you right now, Bobby, I'm not going to arrest him again. If he comes near me and isn't already in handcuffs, I swear I'll kill him. I don't care. I'll shoot him on the spot. He's not getting the chance to touch me or anyone else ever again."

Bobby nodded in understanding. Having him on the loose scared her. Her faltering hold on her emotions had Bobby worried. He needed to calm her down. "It's OK. You need to relax. They're going to find him. No one is going to let him hurt you."

Alex closed her eyes. Taking a deep breath, she nodded. She couldn't explain how on edge she suddenly was. She hated what this was doing to her. This wasn't her. She felt like she was spinning out of control, and Alex hated that feeling. She didn't do helpless, because it made her feel weak, and weak was an unacceptable feeling.

Bobby watched her relax a little. She seemed to be calming down. Relieved, he began to settle down himself. Tentatively reaching out, he cupped her cheek. He was encouraged when she didn't pull away. She simply closed her eyes and seemed to compose herself further. After a long moment, he whispered, "Trust _me. _Alright? I promise. I will not let anything happen to you. Not ever."

Alex nodded again. Letting Bobby pull her into a hug, she relaxed into his arms. Taking a calming breath, she focused on the slow circles Bobby was making on her back. He'd give her another moment, but he knew he had to get her to go back and hook up with a team. They were vulnerable out alone. Aiden had a gun.

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Turning his attention back to the officers around him, Mike sighed. Bobby would take care of Alex. Focusing on the task of hand, Mike joined Carolyn in the process of taking control and splitting everyone into teams to search the building. Without talking about it, both Mike and Carolyn ensured they were part of the group going down the direction that Alex and Bobby had gone. They wanted to make sure they were OK, and they weren't interrupted.

As the teams dispersed, Carolyn sighed. Looking at Mike, she offered, "Let's go."

Mike nodded. He was confident Aiden was still in the building somewhere. Leading their team down the hall, they split up more to check rooms and smaller hallways. It was just him and Carolyn, when he rounded a corner. Immediately relaxing, he gave a soft sigh. Bobby had Alex in a hug. Looking over at Carolyn, he quirked his eyebrows, slightly amused.

Carolyn shook her head. She hated to break the moment, but she knew Jackson, O'Malley, Smith, and Dugger would be joining them in just a moment. Approaching them, she spoke up, "Hey."

Pulling out of Bobby's arms, Alex turned around to face the still approaching Mike and Carolyn. Pasting a smile on her face, she greeted them, "Hey."

Concerned, Carolyn asked, "Are you alright?"

With a nod, Alex assured them both, "Yeah. I'm fine." Seeing the guns, she asked, "You two took this hallway?"

With a nod, Mike replied, "Yeah. The rest of our team is coming."

As Carolyn's radio crackled to life, she stepped aside to get reports back from the other team.

As if on cue, the four officers came around the corner. O'Malley stated, "Its all clear."

With a nod, Mike sighed. He replied, "Let's keep going then. He has to be in the building somewhere."

Rejoining the group, Carolyn replied, "Team one and team three are finished their corridors. No sign of him."

Bobby was the one to sigh now. This was ridiculous. He suggested, "Come on. We need to find him."

Alex didn't like any of this. It felt wrong. Something was wrong. Following the rest of the group down the hall, she prayed to God, they found him and soon. She was suddenly exhausted. She just wanted to go home, crawl into bed, and never get up again.

Fifteen minutes later the group was headed back to the meeting place, dejected. There was no sign of him, except for the gun. One last group needed to call in with their final verdict and the whole building would be cleared. A rock formed in the pit of Alex's stomach. She knew they were going to give the building the all-clear. About five minutes ago, she had started to believe he was gone. Now she knew. Deep inside of her, she knew. Aiden was out there somewhere, again, and she had no one to blame but herself. She had provoked him. She had gotten him removed from the courtroom. This was her fault. She couldn't shake that feeling.

Irritated, Mike led in silence. He had been so sure that Aiden was still in the building. Now all of his hope was pinned on one last group, team six. He was refusing to give up. That's when his radio crackled to life. "South corridor is clear."

Alex closed her eyes and let out a resigned sigh. She had been right. He was on the loose again.

Bobby instinctively clenched his hand into a fist. He was angry now. He wanted to punch the wall. One look at Alex though told him she needed him to hold it together.

Meeting Carolyn's disappointed eyes, Mike sighed in frustration. Almost throwing the radio, he spat, "Damn it!"

Shaking her head, Alex spoke up first. "Don't! Just...don't." She moved around Mike. Taking off down the hall, she wanted a little space. She wanted to process what just happened.

Bobby watched Alex walk ahead of them. He talked to Mike and Carolyn as he did. "Get our guys back to 1PP. We need every available cop in the city looking for him. He's dangerous. I'll, uh, take care of her."

Quickly following Alex's path, Bobby stopped when he reached an empty courtroom. Leaning against the doorframe, he watched as Alex stared at the witness stand from her seat up front.

After a moment, he licked his lips and ventured towards her. With a sigh, he quietly sat down beside her. Without even looking at him, she leaned over and wrapped her arms around him. She buried her face in his chest and let the tears go.

Closing his eyes, Bobby turned a little in his seat to be more comfortable. Wrapping his arms around her, he held her close. Taking a shaky breath, he gently rubbed her back. He knew there wasn't a thing he could say or do that would make this better or easier on her.

It took Alex a few minutes, but when she finally began to pull herself together, she murmured, "I'm sorry…" She wanted to be stronger than this. She hated how this could still affect her. It wasn't like he hadn't been on the loose before.

Shaking his head, Bobby pulled away enough to meet her eyes. He insisted, "No. Don't. You have nothing to apologize for." This was killing him. He could only imagine what it was doing to her. He tried to assure her, "We're going to find him again. He's going to pay for everything he's done…"

Pulling away completely, Alex laughed bitterly. Turning back to face the witness stand, she lamented, "Everything but what he did to me and Anne Garrison."

Bobby closed his eyes. He reached over and took her hand. Looking at her again, he swallowed hard. "Alex, look at me, please." When she turned to look at him, he met her eyes. Relieved, he continued, "No, he won't be punished directly for what he did to you two, but we built a strong case. He's not going to get off. When we find him, he's going to jail, and I know that means something to you." He gave her hand a gentle squeeze. "It's important to you."

Alex reached over and tentatively stroked his cheek. Meeting his eyes again, she whispered, "Thank you."

Bobby's mouth twitched into a smile. Removing his hand from hers, he reached up and took her hand from his face. He asked, "Why are you thanking me?" He shook his head. "Do you have any idea how amazing you are?"

Alex swallowed hard. Leaning forward, she kissed him softly. Tangling her hand into his hair, she pulled him closer and deepened the kiss. When air finally became an issue, she pulled away. Panting, she met his eyes. She leaned her forehead against his. She whispered, "You don't coddle me, and you always know what I need to hear. I am so in love with you."

Bobby smiled softly. He stroked her cheek. "I love you more than I thought I could love anyone."

Alex leaned her head over on his shoulder again. She sighed contentedly. Closing her eyes, she whispered, "God, only you could make me feel like this after what just happened. Like it's really going to be OK."

Bobby leaned over and kissed the top of her head. He quietly assured her, "It is going to be OK, Alex."

Alex closed her eyes. She replied, "I think I'll wait until this is all over before I get my hopes up and believe that."

Relaxing, he wrapped an arm around her. He sighed softly. He whispered, "What happened today wasn't your fault, you know? You didn't know what he was going to try."

Alex sighed. She tried to concentrate on the soothing circles he was making on her arm. Swallowing hard, she whispered, "Yeah…" She wasn't sure she believed that. Two bailiffs were dead, but she was going to try to believe it. She refused to give him any more power. She couldn't hold onto it. She couldn't own Aiden's crimes, not a single one. That was how he won.

Giving her a little more time, Bobby sighed. He never wanted to leave this moment. He wanted to hold her forever. Pulling away again, he took a deep breath. Searching her eyes, he asked, "Are you ready to deal with this? Are you ready to leave here and help look for him?"

Alex took a shaky breath. Nodding with more confidence than she felt, she answered, "Yeah. Yeah, I'm ready." She didn't feel she had a choice. She had to be.


	15. Memories

Dredging up the Past: Ch. 15

By: The Confused One

A/N: I'll be honest. I'm a bit nervous about this chapter. I'm not sure how it's going to be taken. I hope everyone likes it. Special thanks to Sassy for her beta work. Enjoy, and remember to review. Thanks.

Bobby, Alex, Mike, and Carolyn got back to 1PP and turned the layout room into their personal war room. Pulling out the files, Bobby snapped into profiler mode. Getting down to business, he passed them around speaking briskly, "We have a rough outline of his MO. We need to fill it out so we can anticipate his next move and find him."

Carolyn flipped open a file. She nodded. Handing Bobby the file, she explained, "His mother was an abusive heroin addict. He was in and out of foster care. According to the file there, she ran his life, despite her addiction."

Bobby nodded. "He almost always stayed home… His father ran off when he was still an infant. He never knew him." Bobby sighed. "His mother died of an overdose in November of 1983." He glanced up at Alex, who frowned but was stoic. "That was right before he started his rape and murder spree."

Carolyn nodded. "He's narcissistic, angry, resentful…"

Putting the file down, Bobby nodded. "He feels entitled… His mother's death released all of these feelings."

Carolyn nodded in agreement. "Exactly…"

Alex swallowed hard. She looked down at the table, and she really wished they would stop. She didn't want to know how Aiden's mind worked.

Carolyn opened another file. She sighed. "Alright. He goes to a club. Finds a woman who turns him down. It infuriates him. He stalks them, follows them home…"

Alex closed her eyes. _Walking down the sidewalk to her dorm, she thought she heard someone behind her. Stopping, she glanced over her shoulder. She didn't see anyone. Frowning softly, she began walking again._ Shaking her head, Alex tried to pull herself out of the memories.

Bobby nodded. He picked up Carolyn's thread, "He carries a knife. Comes up behind them, and he usually drags them to somewhere more secluded."

Alex's breathing was becoming shallow. _Reaching the dorm room, she felt hands around her waist and a hand over her mouth. She tried to scream._

Mike jumped in, "Usually the bushes."

Bobby nodded. He pointed to Mike. "And never before they get to their home."

_He dragged her to the bushes and threw her to the ground. He moved on top of her. He was so much bigger. None of her struggling helped. He ripped at her clothes._ Shaking slightly now, she tried to a deep breath. She couldn't focus on anything else.

Oblivious to Alex, Bobby continued, "Once he has them alone, he goes through a ritualized torture and rape session."

Carolyn nodded. "He makes strategic cuts and threats, but he doesn't want them dead until he's ready, more power and control. He wants them to fear it, to know it's coming…"

Bobby nodded again. He turned back to the board. "He finally pulls out the rope and strangles them with it. He makes them look at him in their final moments."

Alex was breathing hard. She wasn't sure how much more she could take. _There were tears in her eyes. She punched him, desperately trying to get him off. He put the knife to her throat, as a warning. She could feel the blade against her skin, cutting only slightly. She could feel the few beads of blood trickling down her neck. Releasing inside of her, he grunted. Riding out his release, he leaned forward. He whispered into her ear, "I own you."_ Alex whimpered.

Bobby instantly looked at her. Seeing how pale she was, Bobby was instantly worried. Going to her, he squatted down in front of her. She seemed to be looking right through him. He tentatively took her hands and spoke softly, "Eames..." Her hands were shaking.

Slowly focusing on him, she began to come out of her memories and relax. Taking a shaky breath, she whispered, "Bobby…"

Bobby nodded. "Yeah, it's me. You're OK. Where were you?"

Alex shook her head. "No where. I'm fine."

Bobby sighed. He realized she wasn't going to tell him anything, at least for now. He let it go. "Alright…"

Watching this, Mike ventured, "He's pretty fixated on Eames. We sure he's gong to a club?" He was worried about her.

Carolyn nodded. She insisted, "I'm sure. He won't deviate from his pattern."

Bobby added, "I'm getting a couple of uniforms for protective detail for her. Besides, I'm not…leaving her side. She's fine."

Alex rolled her eyes. The last thing she wanted was people watching her every move. That reminded her. She looked down at her watch and stood. "I have to go." She looked at Bobby. "I'll call you later." She practically ran from the room.

Confused and even more worried, Bobby jumped up. He chased after her to the elevators. Calling after her, he implored, "Eames, wait…"

Pushing the down button again, Alex shook her head. "I can't. I can't right now. Please don't push. I'll talk to you later, Bobby."

Bobby was dumbstruck as she slipped into the elevator and the doors closed. Hurrying back to the layout room, he grabbed his things. "I…have to go, too." He had to know what was going on with her.

Eyeing him critically, Mike didn't like this. He snippily asked, "Is that how you're taking care of her?"

Grabbing the last of his things, Bobby looked up and glared at Mike. "Save it, Mike." He hurried out of the room.

Gathering the files, Carolyn smacked Mike on the back of his head. She glared at him. "That was uncalled for."

Mike rubbed the back of his head. He sighed. "Yeah, well, I'm not convinced you two are right. I'm more worried about her safety than his feelings. We should go look for her."

Carolyn shook her head. "Let Bobby take care of her. We still need to get this picture to the clubs and make sure we don't miss him tonight."

Mike rubbed his face with his hand and nodded. "Yeah." After a moment, he pulled out the picture. "What clubs are we sending it to first?"

Carolyn looked up at him. She suggested, "The trendy, out of the way places first."

Mike sighed. "Alright, let's get started and get this over with."


	16. Worrying About Alex

Dredging up the Past: Chapter 16

By: The Confused One

A/N: This chapter really kind of sets up the next chapter, which I'm personally looking forward to. Special thanks to Sassy for looking this over for me. It's greatly appreciated. Please enjoy this chapter, and remember to review. Thanks.

Arriving at Alex's empty apartment, again, Bobby was both worried and frustrated. He had checked her church, the park, the beach, the libraries, and he couldn't find her anywhere. He had finally gone to the grocery store. Carrying some bags of groceries for dinner, he called her siblings and parents. No one had heard from her that afternoon. To keep them from worrying, he said he was just checking to make sure she had told them when dinner was. She was fine, and he'd see them when they got there.

With a sigh, he wasn't sure what to do. He unloaded the groceries and resorted to making the meal for her family. She still wasn't answering her cell phone. That worried him more than anything. He decided he was going to call in an APB if he didn't see or hear from her by the time dinner was ready.

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Mike and Carolyn finished their calls and the faxing. Gathering their things, Carolyn sighed heavily. It had been a really bad and long day.

Since their words from earlier, Mike and Carolyn had barely spoken. Glancing up, Mike was feeling guilty about that. Hoping to call a truce, he ventured, "Carolyn, I… Would you like to grab something to eat?"

Carolyn looked up and met his eyes. She sensed it was his olive branch. She smiled softly. With a nod, she effectively took the olive branch. "That would be nice." Grabbing her things, she quietly walked with him to the elevator.

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Dinner was almost finished, and Bobby was pacing. His anxiety increasing with each minute that passed that he didn't know where she was. Her family would be there in twenty minutes. He didn't know how he would explain her absence. He then heard the lock turn on the front door. Taking a deep breath, he felt the relief flood him. He quickly walked out to the den. He channeled all of his fear into anger.

Oblivious to everything, Alex unlocked the door. Opening it, she was struck by the wonderful smell of food cooking. Immediately seeing Bobby, she jumped. Confused by his presence, she came all the way in. "Bobby…"

Ignoring the fact that he had startled her, he demanded, "Where have you been?"

Frowning, Alex pulled her coat off. She cryptically snapped, "Out. Don't worry about it." She was too embarrassed to admit the truth.

Bobby snorted. He shook his head. "No. That's not good enough. You didn't answer your phone or call anyone. You just vanished. I've been worried sick. Where have you been?"

Feeling a little guilty, Alex looked down at the floor. She still shook her head though. She stubbornly replied, "I'm sorry I worried you, but it's none of your business. Just let it go. I'm fine."

Eyes blazing, Bobby was having none of it. He argued, "He is still out there, and he's fixated on you. Did you give any thought to that? Did you even consider how worried I was going to be? Did you remember your family is coming over for dinner? I cooked dinner. Please…don't shut me out."

Alex closed her eyes. She sighed, knowing he was right. Shifting uncomfortably, all desire to fight left her. She replied more sincerely, "I know. I really am sorry. I didn't mean to scare you. I had…an appointment, and I had to clear my head, alone, afterwards. I should have called, let you know I was OK."

Bobby relaxed a little. Taking a step towards her, he quietly replied, "You can't disappear on me like that, Alex. You scared the hell out of me."

Alex nodded. "You're right. It was stupid. I was…embarrassed. I took your advice. I made an appointment with a shrink this morning. I met with her this afternoon."

Suddenly it all made sense, and Bobby relaxed completely. Feeling a little guilty himself, Bobby closed the distance. Pulling her into a hug, he held her. Taking a deep breath, he kissed the top of her head. He whispered, "I'm sorry I yelled at you."

Shaking her head, Alex rested her head on his shoulder. She quietly replied, "No, you were right. I'm so sorry. I was selfish, and it was stupid. It was irresponsible. Thank you, Bobby, for being here…" Taking a shaky breath, she pulled her head away and looked up at him. "You've been amazingly patient. Thank you for…cooking. What are you cooking anyway?"

Bobby smiled softly. Pulling away, he took her hand and led her to the kitchen. He answered, "Roasted chicken with garlic sauce, green beans, and mashed potatoes with gravy." He brought her over to the immaculately set table. Sitting her down, he explained, "I'm almost done. So you just sit here and relax until they get here."

Alex smiled again. Watching him, she shook her head. "Really, Bobby, I'm OK. I can help."

Bobby stirred the gravy. He insisted, "No, you sit."

Alex sighed. Relenting, she assured him, "Well, it smells good."

Bobby smiled. "Thank you." Hedging momentarily, he ventured, "Alex, I need to…" He stopped and turned to face her. Leaning against a cabinet, he met her eyes. "What happened today…in the layout room?"

Alex looked away. Staring at the floor, her face fell. She quietly admitted, "Flashbacks. I…was remembering what happened."

Bobby closed his eyes for a moment. It was exactly what he had feared. Swallowing hard, he walked over to her. Squatting down to her level, he pulled her into a hug. He whispered, "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. If I had known… I never would have…"

Alex nodded. Wrapping her arms around his neck, she held him close. "I know. It's OK. It wasn't your fault. I know how you work." She closed her eyes and savored the feel of being in his arms, being close to him. It was the only place she felt safe at the moment. "I didn't realize how much was going to come back. Just…never let me go."

Bobby sighed softly. "You buried so much…"

Alex nodded. "Yeah…" Sniffling, she buried her face in his neck. She murmured, "I just… I want it to go away. I want it over with."

Taking a shaky breath, Bobby rubbed her back for a moment. He finally whispered, "It will be, Alex. I promise you it will be."

Alex closed her eyes. She quietly promised, "I won't just take off on you like that again. I promise."

Bobby nodded. He relaxed. "Thank you. I just… I need to know you're safe."

Alex swallowed hard. She finally pulled away and met his eyes. "Is that why there are three plain clothes cops placed around the building and one in the lobby?"

Bobby couldn't help but smile. He should have known. "You noticed?"

Rolling her eyes, she smacked his arm. She nodded. "Of course I did."

He realized then just how out of it she had been in the layout room. He sighed and assured her, "They're only going to be here until he's caught again. I promise. He's on the loose, and we don't know if he's going to come after you. It's for your protection."

Alex sighed. She finally nodded again. "I know. I don't like it, but I understand." She gave him a quick kiss. "Thank you."

Before Bobby could reply further, there was a knock on the door. With a sigh, Bobby stood up and assured her, "I'll get it."

Alex rolled her eyes. Getting up, she walked to the stove to check on the food one last time. She was feeling guilty enough about earlier that she'd let him try to take care of her, if that's what he needed at the moment.

Opening the door, it was just as Bobby expected. He smiled. "Mr. and Mrs. McCall, it's nice to see you again."

Mary McCall hugged Bobby. Pulling away, she put her hand to his cheek. "It's good to see you, too, Bobby. But how many times do I have to tell you to call me Mary?"

Bobby smiled. "A few more."

John shook his head. He hugged Bobby, too. "Same thing for me, Bobby. Call me John."

Bobby nodded. "I'll try to remember that." He turned his head to the kitchen. "Eames, your parents are here…"

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Getting to the deli, Mike and Carolyn got their sandwiches and sat down. Unwrapping his sandwich, Mike commented, "I think we got all of the clubs."

Carolyn nodded. "Yeah, we did." She took a bite of her sandwich.

Mike watched her. He ventured, "I'm just worried about her."

Carolyn nodded again. She ate a chip. "I know you are. We all are, but Bobby is doing what he can. We don't need to be arguing amongst ourselves."

Mike sighed. He agreed, "You're right. We don't, and I'll apologize." He glanced at his phone. Looking back up, he caught her look. "I'm waiting for the plain clothes officers to call me and let me know she's home."

Carolyn smiled. She shook her head. "That's sweet, but she'd kick your ass for that."

Mike snickered. He finally nodded again. "You're right. She would. Which is why certain people aren't going to tell her…right?"

Carolyn laughed. She took a bite of her sandwich and smirked. "I won't say a word."

Mike was about to speak again when his phone rang. With a sigh, he reached over and picked it up. "Logan."

Watching the door, Smith replied, "You asked us to let you know when Eames got home. She just did."

Mike smiled. With a nod, he replied, "Good. Thank you. Is Goren there?"

Smith nodded. "He's been here longer than she has."

That didn't surprise Mike in the least. He finally nodded again. "Alright. Thank you for calling, and stay alert."

Smith nodded again. He assured Mike, "We will. Bye." Hanging up, he focused completely on the building again.

Mike smirked and looked at Carolyn. "Apparently Bobby never found her. He's been at her place for a while, and she's just getting home."

Carolyn sighed. "At least she's alright. Can you lay off of them now?"

Mike ate another chip. He finally nodded again. "Yeah, I can. Do you really think she's safe and that Aiden is going to a club?"

Carolyn looked down at the table. She finally looked back and met Mike's eyes. "No. I'm not one hundred percent sure."

Mike sighed in frustration. "Didn't think so."


End file.
